TV will rot your brain

In case you need a little refresher on the Mouser scale.



I spent Friday evening watching all three of the blockbuster mailers I had received over the week.




The Hamiltons


Wow. Talk about your plot twists.


This movies was one of the After Dark Horror Fests Eight Films to Die For in 2006. They were released over a course of three days and then went directly to video. Supposedly they were "Too scary for the average viewer." having seen five so far I would have to say not. But that is a whole new can of worms.


So the Hamiltons is about a family of siblings with a dark secret. The story is told mostly from teenager Francis' point of view. Through the course of the movie we start to get an idea of what horrible secret the family harbors. I would not say it was a stellar rental but it was probably the best out of the Eight Films to Die for. It had an original idea and presented itself well. I give it three mousers out of five.



Suspiria
I would like to start off by saying that I believe this film was probably very frightening at the time it was produced. By today's standards it falls a little flat. Suzy Bannion is an American who enrolls in a prestigious ballet academy in Germany that she realizes is run by witches. You do not see the whole witch storyline to often today. It was a nice change of pace from the norm. This is actually the first in a trilogy by Argento about the witches. I plan to watch the second installment "Inferno" soon. The third and final chapter is still in production and stars Dario's daughter Asia Argento whom you might remember from her roles in XXX with Vin Diesel or Day of the Dead. I give this one only two out of five simply because I am spoiled by modern cinema.


Dark Corners
They tried so hard to make this scary. The only way to describe this it that it is a psychological thriller that makes you go a bit insane along with the main characters. Was there a plot? I really do not know folks. One out of five

Since I mentioned them I will give you a quick run down of how the eight films rated for me.

The Grave dancers- Four out of Five mousers. Evil spirits punish disrespectful people who dared to dance upon their graves. Definitely some intense moments and the make up effects were creepy.



Wicked Little Things- One out of five. Children kill and eat people? I kept wondering why no one just ran them over or grabbed a bat. Please do not waste your time on this. I beg you.



Penny Dreadful- two out of five. Penny is phobic of cars so she and her Shrink take a road trip to cure her. To bad a crazy psycho wants to kill them. This one was fairly humorous.



The Hamiltons- already reviewed.



Abandoned- waiting on it to come in the mail



Snoop Dogg's Hood of Horror- Do I really need to specify why I will be skipping this one? Snoop Dogg already did a Horror flick Called "Bones". It sucked. Besides how scary is a guy that spends most of his time smoking weed?



Dark Ride- Not sure if I am on board for this one either. A serial killer that haunts a roller coaster?



The was actually a ninth film titled "Reincarnation" it is a Japanese flick to I will just wait for the American remake staring Sarah Michelle Gellar.