Swiss Sofa

There is a war being waged in my house. (Seems like there always is these days.) The main aggressor is under 2 yrs old and has a limited vocabulary. Her current opponent is not even human. It is princess general lorelei vs. inigo the pugliest for the rights to my lap. She won the first two rounds because she is louder. Being the most annoying gets you a lot. Ever hear the phrase the squeaky wheel gets the oil?
Inigo is in the proverbial dog house so he should not be getting any momma time anyways. The rotten beast ate a hole in my mother's chaise. Call me crazy but I prefer the furniture not resemble swiss cheese. While we are on the subject of Inigo's indiscretions I should mention that he brought me a gift he found in the back yard. Buster.
Another Internet celeb bites the dust. It is possible that it was one of his siblings. When I look down to spot a dead bird at my feet I really don't care much beyond how quick I can dispose of it. I don't know if Inigo is responsible for the death. It wasn't in bad shape if you get my drift. Could have been the massive downpour, lack of food, various animals, divine intervention, who knows? I do not plan on dwelling on it after this post. I love animals and nature. Sorry he died. Really sorry he chose my backyard to keel over. In the end Mother Nature is a harsh taskmaster. That is why I try to avoid it.

Buster

lots of commotion over here. I tested my hand at wild bird rescue this afternoon. Got the kids up from nap time to this pathetic chirping. Some Internet research and phone calls led to the events that follow in video below.

Meet Buster


This is where Buster is supposed to be.


Buster's siblings


Rescue attempt #1


Rescue attempt #2


Just going to hang out and wait for Mom.


I am happy to report that both Mom and Dad bird have returned to tutor little Buster more. No idea if they will get him back in the nest. I went out to check on him but his parents let me know I was not welcome. I backed off, happy to no longer feel the need to worry about him.

The Bed Wetter

Woke up to a nice little wet spot in my bed at 7 AM. Lorelei had removed her diaper. She peed on me. She is a sweet girl. Have to change all my linens. We needed a lighter blanket on the bed anyway. I hate washing our sheets and blankets. They are king size. We just bought new front loaders so it should not be such a pain any longer. I have to go sit and figure out my new washer and dryer. They have more buttons than my car.

It has been very hot here this week. Unusually so for this area. Our ceiling fan wore out yesterday. we run that poor thin 100% all day, every day. I would wear out too. J replaced it and I am happy to say we now have our fast fan back. J and I are extremely hot natured. we passed that tradition to our children. I think the summers in Alaska would make our family whine that it is too hot. Really we are just a bunch of wimps. I survived in Texas for 15 of my 25 years. It was miserable but I made it. I look back now and wonder how. Seems unfathomable to me. Texas, I love you. You are just too smokin' for me.

Games little girls play

Lorelei has a new game she likes to play.



What does the dog say?




In case you are wondering that is my Mom holding Lorelei. I was the director. Yes I know I sound like Jeff Foxworthy's long lost relative with that accent. Might have something to do with growing up in Texas. Just a thought.

Zombies

I grew up thinking zombie movies were just plain dumb. I was not scared of them at all. I didn't see the horror in them. They were stupidly ridiculous. i wanted nothing to do with them. In 2004 Zach Snyder directed a remake of the classic Romero movie "Dawn of the Dead". I get it now. Zombies are freaky. Totally of topic here but do you think that zombie movies are really all about the fear of being a very small minority? Nah, it is about not getting eaten alive.

Dawn of the dead (2004 remake) trivia

• The word "zombie" is never used.
• For the scene where Ana stitches Kenneth's wounds, the director hired a real nurse for the close-ups. She misunderstood the director's directions to go deeper and inadvertently punctured Ving Rhames' skin and stitched the prosthesis to his arm. He didn't say anything until after the scene was done filming and the director thought the blood was merely "a really good effect".
• Different colors of blood were used for zombies in different stages of decomposition: red for the recently dead, a browner version for the ones that have been dead for a few weeks; and a blacker, oilier version for the ones that have been dead for a considerable period of time.
• The two zombies with missing limbs (the jogger missing an arm and the legless zombie in the parking garage) were both played by actual amputees. The same thing was done for one of the first zombies seen in the original Dawn of the Dead (1978).
  
• Shot in chronological order.
• Most of the zombie makeup was modeled after real and gruesome forensic photos
• 

Dawn of the dead (2004 remake) quotes

Ana: Why are they coming here?
Kenneth: Memory, maybe. Instinct. Maybe their coming for us.

Kenneth: Is everyone there dead?
Steve: Well, dead-ish.
Kenneth: Is everyone there dead?
Steve: Yeah, in the sense that they all sort of, uh... fell down... and then got up... and started eating each other.

Kenneth: You know how to use that?
Michael: [pointing to the gun barrel] This is the dangerous end, right?
Kenneth: [Taking the safety off] Now it is.


After watching dawn of the dead J bought the video game dead rising. One person alone with thousands of dead people that want to snack on you. Makes my skin crawl. The best thing about this game is that everything is a weapon. You want to hold of the zombies by beating them with a teddy bear? Be my guest! Personally I loved the lawn mower. There is a sequel coming out in November that J is just chomping at the bit to have.

I play adventure role playing type games when I actually sit down to play them. J got me into this first person shooter game called Left for dead. It was a co-op so we got to play together. It was really a lot of fun. great way to relieve stress too! My brother in law also had the game so we played online. Now we just have to get my sister in law on so we can have a family game! Left for dead is dropping a sequel in November as well. I am looking forward to spending time with my J zombie hunting.

Here is a funny story. In the game there are things that alert the horde to your presence. One of these things is car alarms. J and I are playing and I realize that i am somehow off on my own. i tiptoe around looking for my partner when all of a sudden the car next to me begins to wail. The horde comes out of nowhere and feast on me. J had set a trap for me! He wanted to unlock the achievement for killing a certain number of horde by setting them on fire. He sat up in his perch with a sniper rifle and waited for me to get into position. Then he set me on fire while I was being eaten. talk about adding insult to injury. That is the kind of loving relationship we have.

The Dancing Baby

Lorelei like Velcro. She will undo her shoes, your shoes, a random strangers shoes. She does not like to discriminate. Diapers have Velcro of a sort on them you know. Lorelei know too. Any outfit has to either have pants or bloomers to protect her nakedness. She is crawling so pants are a bad idea unless I want the knees worn out. Dresses are not made for crawling as they tend to get in the way. The only bloomers I have match outfits. I just know as soon as I use them I will want to dress her up and not have the matching bloomers. How do we solve this crisis? Panties. I bought a 5 pack of Disney Princess panties to use as diaper covers. $8 for five pairs versus $15 for a single pair of cute bloomers. Much more economical. I got the idea from my aunt T. She was babysitting when Lorelei had a blowout. She couldn't find a pair of bloomers so she grabbed a pair of Rory's underwear. Worked beautifully. If you know a baby that is a diaper remover, tell his/her mom to buy some underwear diaper covers.

Lorelei is learning so much new stuff. She toys with the idea of walking on her feet. she is really good at walking on her knees. I don't think I have ever seen a baby knee walk as an alternative to regular walking. of course my child would be different. Her new favorite thing is dancing and clapping. In the van or in the house she bebops to the music.

Lorelei is all about showing us where her belly button is now. My kids sit on the floor looking at each other's belly buttons. They are sitting nicely and getting along so I let them bond. It won't last long. They will be back to tormenting one another shortly.

Did you know that your belly button is your first scar?

Inigo brought me a potato last night. We were in bed when I heard him trot in. This isn't unusual since he comes in every night once he is ready for bed. I was caught off guard when I heard a giant thunk. That was the potato hitting the hard wood floor. Guess he is not getting enough starch in his diet. I took the potato away. You never seen a pug look so stricken. He recovered fast. He is a little trooper.

dancing with the mice

Posting when you are suffering from a lack of sleep is not smart. I learned my lesson when I re-read my "sheep" post. I have been a bit stressed out of late. I think we might just get this house/lease thing figured out this week. That will go a long way toward defusing my stress and returning me to my usual chipper self.

Lorelei has figured out clapping. She applauds herself for everything. It is so cute we just have to join in. She is such a little stinker. Rory was a golden child at this age. He was so sweet and peaceful. Lorelei is a spitfire in a diaper. Nothing and no one is safe. We are in for a ride with her. Rory has come into his own since his quiet baby days. He keeps up with his sister just fine. The two of them together really cement the belief that I am done having more children. What would I do with a third crazy kiddo? I know, invest in a straight jacket.

The yard critters are back. Are they mice? Are they voles? Do I care? Not really. I took the trash out yesterday and two of whatever they are went running past my bare foot. I did a nice little hopping jig. I like to entertain the neighborhood with interpretive dance. I called that particular piece "Eek!" As long as Mickey and Minnie stay outside until we move we will get along.

Send me sheep!

Why am I blogging at 1:42 AM? Insomnia. The lovely head cold that Rory gave Lorelei was passed to me. This began a cycle of odd sleep patterns that have finally caught up with me. Not to mention stress about the house, packing, moving, and the state of the union.
Eh, maybe not that last one so much. I am pretty numb to that right now. Gotta prioritize, ya know.
Inigo is glaring at me with is little pug eyes. I am disturbing his nap time. His snoring bothers mine. What's a pug mom to do? I surrender. Off to count sheep.

Chin up baby

In response to my horrible weekend Parker sent me a link in my email to cheer me up.
Chin Up from the movie Charlotte's Web.
I have the best buddies. Thanks girls for all the well wishes and prayers. I appreciate them and you more than you know!

Bad Weekend

This weekend was major bad for my family. Lorelei has been under the weather but that isn't even a blip on the radar currently.

Wednesday evening we noticed a smell that was none too pleasing. I cleaned the kitchen, the trash can, dishwasher, and disposal. Still the smell remained. Friday evening we located the smell and its cause. In the kitchen we have no cabinet doors. Don't ask, long story. There is one cabinet that is never used due to its awkward location. The cats like to use is for a hidey hole. Yes that little kernel of dread that has developed in the pit of your stomach is correct. The smell was one of my Aunt B's cats. Dead. George bit the dust hard core. J chimes in with "I thought I smelled death." Ever the observant commentator.

You think that was bad. It gets worse.

Monday was the day we were supposed to close on Mom's house in Texas. Notice all the past tense in that sentence. The buyer backed out two. days. before. closing.
Pardon me, I have to climb up on the roof and do a belly flop on a rake.
*sigh
No worries. I am not the suicidal type. Low pain threshold. However I am not above a little homicide so the rake and I might be taking the train to Texas. I kid...maybe...
This puts a HUGE Godzilla size kink in our plans. I might be working on a temp solution so pray HARD for it to work out. We are looking for another buyer in Texas. The Ex-buyers were the first people to look at it after the new floors were installed so we are praying for a fast resolution to the lack of buyer. Just a lot of stress right now.
Did I mention Lorelei is sick? Yep. So even if I manage to forget all the rest of the drama I still have icky baby. She was so kind to share it with me also. I am showing the signs of her cold. Yippee skippee.

Since I need something to make me smile you get the picture below.

Go back to bed!

Rory has figured out that he can get out of his room at will. He knows better than to pop out at nap time or bedtime. Doesn't stop him from opening the door, barking a request, then slamming the door closed. Usually the request is "can I get out?"
Unlike his mother Rory is not much of a sleeper. He can be heard singing or playing several hours after he has been put to bed. Nap time is always a will he/won't he guessing game. As long as he stays in his room quietly for the allotted amount of time I am cool with the no napping thing. The past two mornings Rory has started his day at 7 AM. A loud three year old running two dogs back and forth down the hall is kind of hard to ignore. Lorelei and I are forced out of bed far earlier than we would like.
So tempting to put the childproof doorknob thing back on.