A.I.: The Artificial Insemination Post

Not many people know this but I am a product of artificial insemination. I do not hide it. It just rarely comes up in conversation. Can you imagine trying to slip that nugget of information into the dialogue? I am sharing this here because recently I have met several couples that are finding themselves needing a little medical intervention to become pregnant. They may not be on the same path my parents took but I still felt led to share an adult view point of what it is like to be a child of such a union.

It is blessed.

In the 80's my Mom and Dad tried with gusto to conceive a child. No luck. They were each tested by the Doctors and found out that they both had a complication. Mom's was not insurmountable but would definitely make the road to motherhood bumpier. Dad's however was 100% none possibility. You see Dad was a x-ray tech in the Navy. During his training he and some buddies thought it was entertaining to x-ray random stuff. Mom remembers x-rays that came to her in the mail from Dad of watches and a dead rat they found. Did they wear those nice little lead vests? Nope. ZAP! No babies for you Mister. Hearing what they thought was the end of their journey they decided to adopt. Sadly that fell through in the delivery room when the mother decided she could not part with her child. It was very upsetting for them. So close to having their baby ( a girl ) and then once again gone.
Eventually they found themselves talking about artificial insemination. They lived in the D.C. area then. Dad's family was very concerned that he would have issues raising a child that was not biologically his. His answer was, "Any male can father a child. I am going to be a Daddy." I love that quote :0)

The second round of fertility drugs and sperm donor created me! ten months later in the year of 1984 I was born. Ultra sounds were still not widely used for the sole purpose of determining sex so they did not know if I was a boy or girl until delivery. The Doctor told them that I would be a girl. Three couples before mom and dad had come to this clinic unable to have children and all blessed with girls. He just knew I would be the fourth. Records about the donor are tightly guarded. Today it is a little easier to access for medical questions concerning paternity. All I know about my biological donor is that he was a medical student with two confirmed successes before me. The clinic only allowed for three babies from one donor so as not to populate the area with siblings. However nothing stopped him from moving on to the next donation clinic in the are. Med school is pricey and the clinics paid very well.

I was not told the particulars of my conception until I was a teenager. It was actually an accident that i found out at all. At the time I was watching my whole world fall apart due to my parent's divorce. I was unsure of myself and my father's love for me. When the truth came to light about the artificial insemination I was so happy. Not only did my parents want me they worked hard to have me. Time, money, tests, stress it all was worth it to them to have me. No DNA bound me to my father but he was there at every little league game to watch his cheerleader. He was always at every event, play, and program. Our relationship was far from perfect but until the day he died in 2005 he was always a constant in my life. I have no doubt that I was the most important person in the world to him. Any my mother? Well she has always been my best friend but never at the expense of being my parent first. She is in every thing that I do. Every decision I make. My true north to guide me in the direction I should go.

My life isn't perfect. My childhood was not a fairy tale. I have flaws and issues like anybody else. My place on this earth has never been a question to me. I am here because I was wanted more. I was prayed for. And God answers prayers.

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened ‘ (Matthew 7:7, 8).

P.S. It has been brought to my attention that some folks find the term "Artificial" insemination offensive. Personally I think it is silly. It is not a term to say that the child is artificial. The way that the sperm is introduced to the body is artificial. See not so offensive? Just my 2 cents.