aspirant scribbler

A new bloggy home after long absence

2010-12-30T20:26:00.002-06:00

Due to some crazy operator errors I have to change my bloggy home. From now on you can find the Aspirant Scribbler at Leaping Leprachauns

Hope to see you there!

2 yrs today

2010-04-09T23:51:00.003-05:00

It is 11:51 PM. Two years ago today I was waiting for the epidural to wear off so I could take a shower and get in my room. Then they would bring me back my perfect baby girl who was all of two hours old.

Flash forward to the present and that same little girl is asleep snuggled up to her Daddy. Tomorrow we are having a McDonald's birthday party because this Mom thinks it is great that I can pay $80 bucks for someone else to do all the work. Happy Birthday precious girl!

Hi! I like you.

2010-04-06T11:55:00.002-05:00

My son is now four years old. I have noticed over the last few months that anytime I introduce him to some one new he tells them, "Hi! I like you!" Remember the age when everyone was your friends simply because you had no reason to doubt them? I miss that innocence of childhood. I have to admit that I am still way over friendly. J complains that I will talk to any one for hours about nothing. It is a gift my Mother taught me.

My daughter, who will be two on Friday, is not so open to strangers. She likes her space free of extra bodies. Mostly so she has more room to dance. She is a rump shaker. We are trying to break her of her Lady Gaga addiction. She has an obsession with her. I see many recitals in my future. I danced when I was a teenager. Not well but I managed to keep up. My tiny dancer has more talent at 2 than I did at 14. It is a hard thing to admit but I will survive.

Florida Python

2010-02-01T16:12:00.003-06:00

Up late one night I see a program called Monster Quest on the History Channel. The subject for this weeks episode is giant snakes in America. Here is what the guide said about it: A deadly, slithering menace is taking over Florida and may be heading north. For more than 100 years, giant pythons have been discovered in parts of the Sunshine State, but since Hurricane Andrew in 1992, their territory has rapidly spread. Now, MonsterQuest searches for incursions in the outskirts of Miami, a population hot spot that is just moments from schools and homes. The team investigates whether pythons could hybridize and adapt, enabling them to threaten every state in the US.

By the end of the program the answer is clear that yes pythons are doing a booming business. They caught one that was 20 feet long! Several scientist give their two cents worth but the one I just loved was the guy who said snakes are not aggressive. I agree (sort of) that snakes are not lurking out in the grass waiting to eat human passersby. You cannot argue that bigger snakes need bigger prey. What does a 20 ft python eat? The real question is what does a 20 ft Python NOT eat. It was really an interesting show and I learned a lot. Mostly why I won't be moving to Florida.

If you are interested you can watch it on Saturday, February 06 03:00 PM on the History Channel.

The Trio of Terror & Feline Fire Safety 101

2009-11-30T17:40:00.005-06:00

Pickles stuck her tail in the candle. Instead of delicious iced snow berries scent I had burnt cat hair. Yum. She sleeps on my pillow so I got to smell her all night. I am thankful her tail is fine minus a few singed hair. I am not thankful my pillow smells like smoking cat. Poor pickles complains about everything when she is happy. A smoldering tail just made her whole week.

A little something extra...

The Trio of Terror( or my cats) according to the Lucky Irish Gal Dictionary

Clio \KLEE-oh\ noun: Large, yellow female cat who thinks the world revolves around her. Will most likely make any person in her immediate vicinity pet her.

Pickles \my DD says it is PEEK-os\ noun: Blubberous, gray female with loud, opinionated nature. Will protest anything.

Tree trimming and crying kids

2009-11-29T18:35:00.002-06:00

J and I video chatted while he was at 35,000 feet above the ground. Pretty neat. It finally set in for R that daddy was gone for a while. He told his dad he wanted to be on the plane with him and then dissolved into tears. If he had the power J would have turned the plane around right then. L has been a tiny bear all day. She had cried and whined from sun up to sun down. Over all a fantastic day with two little babies that miss having Daddy home.

I did get all the christmas lights put up outside. The tree is up and decorated. Pretty good progress considering the obstacles I had to overcome to get it done.

A little quality time with the kiddos.

2009-11-28T10:06:00.002-06:00

My DH is off to DC tomorrow morning and won't return until late Thursday evening. Mom has surgery on Tuesday. She will get to come home sometime Thursday as well. That leaves me and the kids at home together for a little forced bonding. It also means that Mom and J will come home to a slightly less sane me than they left behind. It just figures that the week J is gonna be gone would be the same week Mom has her surgery. We are having an out of funds experience right now so I cannot do much with the kids outside of the house. Well I could but I kind of think paying the mortgage is more important than a trip to McDonald's. Call me crazy.

After watching UP my 4 y/o son made Inigo his very own "cone of shame". Isn't he thoughtful?

Pre surgery poking

2009-08-06T21:17:00.000-05:00

Today was my surgery pre testing exam. It was really just questionnaires, sign this here,check your vitals, lets take blood! You know, all that jazz. Of course this sounds like stuff that should take two and a half hours, right? I love the part where they told me I have to be in the waiting room three hours before my appointment on surgery day. J was shocked and appalled. I hate waiting. J brings that hate up to the level of art. Normally J is quiet. He is silent around people he doesn't know. Today I couldn't shut him up. He picked on me unmercifully. I was trying to register and he was using his knuckles to test my reflexes under the desk. You know the lady taking my information loved having her desk kicked. In the office he tried to answer the health questions before i could.

Nurse: Do you snore?
J: No but she breathes like Darth Vader.

Nurse: Are you depressed?
J: Well look at her.

He ducked and just missed getting hit in the head by the book I had in my hands. The nurse asked if I wanted her to put him in the hall. Tempting...but I let him stay. I am used to his brand of abuse, I mean humor. Silly Freudian slips.
On to the bloodletting! A different nurse was sent in to draw my one tiny tube of blood. I am very pale. You can see my veins which lulls you into the delusion that it will be easy to get to it. However, my veins are deep. I despise when I get uber confident nurse or tech that thinks "Easy peasy" and dives right in. Later, when I have blown veins, half moon shapes nail prints in my palm, and a look that would peel paint, we still have no blood in the tiny tube. She even used a tiny needle today. Thankfully she was smart. When she was unsuccessful on her first try, she found someone who draws blood for a living. Is she the only one who knows that this kind of person exists? Only took her one stick to strike the red gold. My only complaint, she used a huge needle.
That just goes to show you can be as gentle and delicate as you want but if you do not know what you are doing, you still make a huge mess.

Slice and dice

2009-07-27T15:48:00.001-05:00

I am off to the ortho doc for a consultation on Friday. Eight years ago I developed a ganglion cyst on my left carpal bone (wrist). My cyst was the result of a trauma. I flipped my wrist backwards trying to push a wheelchair up hill with a person in it. Wasn't any more painful than rolling your ankle. Just happened to look down later and freaked out when I saw the pea size bump on my wrist.

Here is the medical portion of this post:

A ganglion cyst is a tumor or swelling on top of a joint of covering of a tendon (tissue that connects muscle to bone). It looks like a sac (cyst) of liquid. Inside the cyst is a thick, sticky, clear, colorless jellylike material (synovial fluid). depending on the size, cysts may feel firm or spongy. It can be one cyst or multiple that appear as one cyst but usually share a common stalk within the deeper tissue. This type of cyst is not harmful and accounts for about half of all soft tissue tumors on the hand.

I had it aspirated (drained with a HUGE freaking needle) when it initially happened. won't be doing that again. It did not help and I hyperventilated. I have decided that I want it removed. Numb me up, cut me open, dig it out. No idea why that bothers me less than the idea of aspirating it. Probably because when it is extracted it cannot come back. Done.

The aspirating may or may not solve the problem. Pass.

not smart to tell mama no

2009-07-25T17:00:00.000-05:00

The countdown to civilian life is getting closer and closer to zero. I am excited about the pay raise but nervous about the lack of health insurance. We will still have the interim insurance but I never feel safe until the "real" insurance kicks in. Plus the military has taken god care of us medically. We are a tad spoiled when it comes to co pays and prescriptions. I just pray we get awesome insurance with the new company. J is stressing about getting the right job for our family. He is very serious about his hunter/gatherer duties. I am not serious about much of anything.

Lorelei now tells Inigo whether he is being a good dog or a bad dog. She asks for sponge bob. It is cute to hear her ask for her new fav show. However I am not a fan of the sponge. Rory is a huge Sponge-ite. Lately that is the only show I have seen other than Word World. Sesame Street seems to have fallen out of favor. We will have to see if that lasts. I can only handle so much of that laugh before the twitching sends me into a coma.

Rory is being a brave boy. Not a smart boy, but brave. He has begun telling us no. I say he is brave because he knows that this is a one way ticket to punishment. His knowledge of this cause and effect is why I question his smarts. I know he has them. I think he just chooses to ignore them. Nothing makes mama's eyes cross like being openly defied by the three yr old.

Instant Karma- it could happen to you!

2009-07-20T22:34:00.001-05:00

You might think Instant Karma is just a song but it is also our family slogan. I actually did not know it was a song until today. Sad, I know. I like the Beatles but not a fan of the Lennon/Yoko stage. This contributed to my lack of knowledge. I first heard the phrase Instant Karma from Samantha. I also learned to say eat the happy little kitten in Spanish. That one has no real world application for me. We were in our sophomore World History class. We were bantering as we often did. I let go of a zinger and then hurt myself almost immediately. "Instant Karma," Samantha said.

Our kiddos hear this a lot. Maybe it makes us bad parents, I dunno. One child aggravates the other then promptly trips. We check for blood/broken bones and then respond to them with instant karma. J and I are the most frequent victims of this phenomena. I think we are just uncoordinated. Since we are almost always picking on each other it makes sense that these accidents are usually preceded by some action or remark that had us just asking for cosmic retribution.

We also use the game Marco Polo as echo location in our house. We are not a normal family by any stretch of the imagination.

A Swede and an Aussie walk into a blog...

2009-07-20T19:15:00.000-05:00

I googled my blog because I am too lazy to bookmark it on my laptop. Two interesting sites popped up. One was for a town in Sweden. The other was for a town in Australia. It appears my blog is locally popular there. At least this month it is. Could just be a fad. Or some sort of insane misdirection where they really were looking for one thing and wound up on my blog confused. Either way I am just tickled pink that I might have fans! I pretend I don't care but deep down I want you to like me. Iwill admit that I don't know very much about Sweden. That is sad. I might need to do a little research. The pictures and stories I have heard are nice. I would be interested to hear from any one in Sweden or who has been there. What is your favorite place, story, etc about Sweden.

I would like to take a minute to talk to Australia. Please do not be offended by decision to never visit your gorgeous continent. I love the accents, animals, & people. Little known fact, when I first learned about the continents Australia was my favorite. It still is. Something about the shape. However it is sort of a family curse that we have horrendous weird luck. Five minutes off the plane and I would be chased by a funnel web spider, bitten by a koala, fall into the ocean, to be devoured by a shark. I love you Australia. Believe me when i say it is not you, it is me.

Wow Wow

2009-07-18T23:24:00.000-05:00

Lorelei and I are up at 11:30 PM watching "Wow Wow Wubbzy". J, Mom, and I went to see Harry Potter tonight throwing off the kiddos schedule. Usually we do bath, bed, and beyond from 8-8:30PM every night. We didn't get home until 10PM. Lorelei was sacked out in the recliner. She woke up when I laid her in bed. Of course. So happy to see mommy and daddy she was not going back to sleep. She has two more teeth up top. I wonder how long a reprieve we will have before the miserable nights of teething begin anew. I do not remember Rory having a hard time with teething.

Rory has been thrown under the bus over potty training. The experts tell you not to push them. They will do it when they are ready. He turns four in November. His Mommy decided he is ready. I have a very elaborate bribery system concocted with my Mother. It involves m&m's and matchbox cars. Rory is like me in that he is too busy for such mundane activities like the potty. I hate to slow down and do the things I know I have to do. Playing is so much more fun.

Happy I am not a bed bug.

2009-07-16T11:09:00.000-05:00

I have been watching the new TV program "Monsters Inside Me" about parasites. There are more parasites than any other organism on the planet. Freaky huh? Last night I learned why I am so happy I am not a bed bug. The mating of bed bugs is just wrong. The male jumps on the female and spears her through the back with his...um, I think you get the picture. It is called traumatic insemination. Awful stuff there. Another thing I have learned is that if you go to the hospital for an illness but are not satisfied with the diagnosis, speak up! Almost every person on this show was given two wrong diagnosis before they real problem was identified. I felt really sorry for the man with the five bot flies in his head. People thought he was crazy when he told them that he could feel his sores moving. It is a very interesting program but it is making me more paranoid. J is not allowed to watch it. He would seal us in the house after five minutes of viewing. The bed bugs would have had his skin crawling.

Reply to Jenn

2009-07-15T16:23:00.000-05:00

Q: So what's reason #1284 for not swimming unless it's a pool?? :)

A: It is a tie between Barracuda and the ashes of cremated people.

P.S.I think burial at sea is a beautiful thing. I wouldn't swim in the graveyard though.

P.S.S. I do not think barracuda are beautiful.

Little bunny foo foo

2009-07-14T09:53:00.000-05:00

You know the song, right? About Little Bunny Foo Foo hopping through the forest picking up the field mice and bopping them on the head? Inigo was channeling him this morning. He brought me a soggy field mouse from the backyard. I got to be the fairy princess and bop him on the head. No way is he bringing his tiny find into my house.
For those of you keeping count that is one bird and one mouse. Inigo-2, Wildlife-0.

goofy and toofy

2009-07-12T16:06:00.000-05:00

Lorelei has had a double ear infection for about two weeks now. The antibiotics are up but the Doc says she still has a bunch of pressure behind the eardrum. We are managing the discomfort with Tylenol. Seems to be working because this is how I found her after I finished up her big brothers bath last night.

Diapers make excellent hats. She was in high spirits. Looking at that picture I have a hard time reconciling that little girl with the miserable one in my arms four hours later. Besides the ears and a wonderful cold she picked up we are also teething. I felt her little gums and found 2-3 swollen spots where teeth are trying to erupt. She sobbed for almost 2 hours. Teething tablets and time finally saw us back to bed. We were both exhausted. Not that you could tell by how perky she was today. I am cautious. I know she is as unpredictable as the sea.

Real TV

2009-07-09T16:10:00.000-05:00

Do you watch reality television? I do. I watch So You Think You Can Dance. I love Tabitha and Napoleon's choreography. Mia Michael's annoys me to pieces. Interpretive dancing is not my favorite style. When Mia choreographs I roll my eyes and skip to the next dance. Thank heavens for DVRs. Last night J walked into the bedroom while Lorelei and I were watching SYTYCD. She loves the music and likes to dance along. It was the Mia piece. J is extremely anti reality television. The look on his face told me that he was not impressed with the performance. "I know" I said, "I do not think it looks like dancing either. I mean, I can have a seizure on stage as well as the next person."Season 5 Top 20

Go phillip and jeanette!

What is with the strange stories? I like it when the dancing tells a story but aliens impregnating people? crash test dummies? I think I will pass. Remember the mother/daughter fox thing Wade Robson did? He is kind of a strange bird. I think working with Britney and the various boy bands caused a mild mental breakdown. The traditional Russian dance was interesting. I don't think it was necessary. No matter what couple pulled that card it was bound to be a disaster.

wade robson's crash test dummy jazz routine

Um, that is really my only reality show. Not into Survivor, American Idol, Dancing with the Stars, Bachelor/ette, etc.
I like the discovery or animal planet shows where people just happened to be filming at the right time. You know the ones. Silly zoo goer wants to get a close up picture of Ting Ting the Panda. Fast forward to Ting Ting laying the smack down on silly zoo goer. Recently saw some divers on Untamed and Uncut have a great white hop into the shark cage with them. Reason #3569821 why I do not swim unless in a pool.
Medical Mystery, Worst Highway Chases in history, these are the shows that label me as a train wreck watcher. Only on TV. I think it is just wrong to stop your car on the highway to watch someone elses misfortune. Rude, rude, rude.

Run away rodents

2009-07-07T19:19:00.000-05:00

My voles are back. (Kind of like mini moles) I still have Mickey and Minnie living in the wood pile. I don't mind them so much as long as they stay outside. With as many cats as we have it is their funeral should they decide to come in. In this case I still don't see them. I am fine with that. I hope they stay outside. The idea of being ripped apart by a creature 3X the size you are is just not an appealing death. J has a vendetta going with the voles. You see voles eat earth worms (among other things I am sure). We have a very nice lawn that J worked 2 years to attain. The earthworms really like our lawn. We grow very fat, happy voles. If they did not make little holes all over the yard J might not hate them.

side track moment...
The first time I saw them I swore it was a snake hole. In Texas holes like that house snakes, not this weird rodent I had never heard of. I didn't know what one looked like up close until Linus (our golden) dumped a dead one in my lap. I was very pregnant at the time with Lorelei. Happy camper was not the best description for me that day. Poor Linus. He really payed the piper for that.

...back on topic.
Take a walk through my yard. You will see the little dudes sprint through the grass. They are flat and dark so at first I thought it was a giant water roach. I totally prefer rodents over roaches. Our bug guy told us how to get rid of the buggers. Spread citronella granules over the grass. Earthworms eat it. Voles eat citro worms and die. I am not sure how I feel about it yet. They ARE outside. Our yard is not destroyed. Just a few tiny holes. They DO eat the bugs so a purpose is served. Why do I care? I think it is the little noses that do it to me. They twitch to the beat of my heart. Look at the picture below.
How can you say that ain't cute? J has a horrible memory. He never reads my blog. I think the voles are safe. Geez, I can't believe I am conspiring with rats.

4th of July Mall Crawl

2009-07-06T17:14:00.001-05:00

We started our fourth of July by watching wall-E in the "big bed" together. Good thing we have a king size or all four of us would not fit. We didn't have anything planned. No cook outs or fireworks. After nap time we got bored. Kids and adults piled into the van. J drove around aimlessly until somehow we ended up at the Galleria in Brentwood. I was getting Lorelei out the car when i realized she had blown out her diaper. She has been on antibiotics for a double ear infection. I had a spare outfit or we would have wasted a trip.

I know kids grow fast but wow she shot up quick. Brave man to have her up there after the diaper I just changed. In this particular mall is a fantastic pizza place called the California Pizza Kitchen. There are so many choices for pizzas. I was a little overwhelmed. i will let you in on a little secret. I don't like pizza that much. They have more than pizza at CPK (California pizza kitchen not cabbage patch kids). I am trying to bring my cholesterol down so pizza and pastas are not on my list. Neither is much in the way of dairy, sugar, and red meat. I am reduced to granola and cardboard all because of 30 points. (kill me now) Oh well. Now is the time for that healthy living over haul I have been pondering.

She lasted about 45 seconds before the crayons went in the mouth.

Pizza and coca-cola. What kid could be happier?

Back on topic. I ordered a chicken won ton wrap thing. Won tons are bad for the diet but better than pizza dough. They were thin, I promise. The won tons were stuffed with chicken, tomato's, avocado, and bacon. i would have done without the bacon. I tried to scrap it out so J could put it on his pizza. He appreciated that. J's pizza was the epitome of all the things I cannot have right now. It was called the meat cravers deep dish pizza.

Mmmm, Kiwi Lemonade. So delicious.

What did you do for the fourth?

Swiss Sofa

2009-06-29T19:20:00.000-05:00

There is a war being waged in my house. (Seems like there always is these days.) The main aggressor is under 2 yrs old and has a limited vocabulary. Her current opponent is not even human. It is princess general lorelei vs. inigo the pugliest for the rights to my lap. She won the first two rounds because she is louder. Being the most annoying gets you a lot. Ever hear the phrase the squeaky wheel gets the oil?
Inigo is in the proverbial dog house so he should not be getting any momma time anyways. The rotten beast ate a hole in my mother's chaise. Call me crazy but I prefer the furniture not resemble swiss cheese. While we are on the subject of Inigo's indiscretions I should mention that he brought me a gift he found in the back yard. Buster.
Another Internet celeb bites the dust. It is possible that it was one of his siblings. When I look down to spot a dead bird at my feet I really don't care much beyond how quick I can dispose of it. I don't know if Inigo is responsible for the death. It wasn't in bad shape if you get my drift. Could have been the massive downpour, lack of food, various animals, divine intervention, who knows? I do not plan on dwelling on it after this post. I love animals and nature. Sorry he died. Really sorry he chose my backyard to keel over. In the end Mother Nature is a harsh taskmaster. That is why I try to avoid it.

Buster

2009-06-24T15:02:00.000-05:00

lots of commotion over here. I tested my hand at wild bird rescue this afternoon. Got the kids up from nap time to this pathetic chirping. Some Internet research and phone calls led to the events that follow in video below.

Meet Buster

This is where Buster is supposed to be.

Buster's siblings

Rescue attempt #1

Rescue attempt #2

Just going to hang out and wait for Mom.

I am happy to report that both Mom and Dad bird have returned to tutor little Buster more. No idea if they will get him back in the nest. I went out to check on him but his parents let me know I was not welcome. I backed off, happy to no longer feel the need to worry about him.

The Bed Wetter

2009-06-24T07:57:00.000-05:00

Woke up to a nice little wet spot in my bed at 7 AM. Lorelei had removed her diaper. She peed on me. She is a sweet girl. Have to change all my linens. We needed a lighter blanket on the bed anyway. I hate washing our sheets and blankets. They are king size. We just bought new front loaders so it should not be such a pain any longer. I have to go sit and figure out my new washer and dryer. They have more buttons than my car.

It has been very hot here this week. Unusually so for this area. Our ceiling fan wore out yesterday. we run that poor thin 100% all day, every day. I would wear out too. J replaced it and I am happy to say we now have our fast fan back. J and I are extremely hot natured. we passed that tradition to our children. I think the summers in Alaska would make our family whine that it is too hot. Really we are just a bunch of wimps. I survived in Texas for 15 of my 25 years. It was miserable but I made it. I look back now and wonder how. Seems unfathomable to me. Texas, I love you. You are just too smokin' for me.

Games little girls play

2009-06-22T21:45:00.000-05:00

Lorelei has a new game she likes to play.

What does the dog say?

In case you are wondering that is my Mom holding Lorelei. I was the director. Yes I know I sound like Jeff Foxworthy's long lost relative with that accent. Might have something to do with growing up in Texas. Just a thought.

Zombies

2009-06-21T00:37:00.000-05:00

I grew up thinking zombie movies were just plain dumb. I was not scared of them at all. I didn't see the horror in them. They were stupidly ridiculous. i wanted nothing to do with them. In 2004 Zach Snyder directed a remake of the classic Romero movie "Dawn of the Dead". I get it now. Zombies are freaky. Totally of topic here but do you think that zombie movies are really all about the fear of being a very small minority? Nah, it is about not getting eaten alive.

Dawn of the dead (2004 remake) trivia

The word "zombie" is never used.
For the scene where Ana stitches Kenneth's wounds, the director hired a real nurse for the close-ups. She misunderstood the director's directions to go deeper and inadvertently punctured Ving Rhames' skin and stitched the prosthesis to his arm. He didn't say anything until after the scene was done filming and the director thought the blood was merely "a really good effect".
Different colors of blood were used for zombies in different stages of decomposition: red for the recently dead, a browner version for the ones that have been dead for a few weeks; and a blacker, oilier version for the ones that have been dead for a considerable period of time.
The two zombies with missing limbs (the jogger missing an arm and the legless zombie in the parking garage) were both played by actual amputees. The same thing was done for one of the first zombies seen in the original Dawn of the Dead (1978).
Shot in chronological order.
Most of the zombie makeup was modeled after real and gruesome forensic photos

Dawn of the dead (2004 remake) quotes

Ana: Why are they coming here?
Kenneth: Memory, maybe. Instinct. Maybe their coming for us.

Kenneth: Is everyone there dead?
Steve: Well, dead-ish.
Kenneth: Is everyone there dead?
Steve: Yeah, in the sense that they all sort of, uh... fell down... and then got up... and started eating each other.

Kenneth: You know how to use that?
Michael: [pointing to the gun barrel] This is the dangerous end, right?
Kenneth: [Taking the safety off] Now it is.

After watching dawn of the dead J bought the video game dead rising. One person alone with thousands of dead people that want to snack on you. Makes my skin crawl. The best thing about this game is that everything is a weapon. You want to hold of the zombies by beating them with a teddy bear? Be my guest! Personally I loved the lawn mower. There is a sequel coming out in November that J is just chomping at the bit to have.

I play adventure role playing type games when I actually sit down to play them. J got me into this first person shooter game called Left for dead. It was a co-op so we got to play together. It was really a lot of fun. great way to relieve stress too! My brother in law also had the game so we played online. Now we just have to get my sister in law on so we can have a family game! Left for dead is dropping a sequel in November as well. I am looking forward to spending time with my J zombie hunting.

Here is a funny story. In the game there are things that alert the horde to your presence. One of these things is car alarms. J and I are playing and I realize that i am somehow off on my own. i tiptoe around looking for my partner when all of a sudden the car next to me begins to wail. The horde comes out of nowhere and feast on me. J had set a trap for me! He wanted to unlock the achievement for killing a certain number of horde by setting them on fire. He sat up in his perch with a sniper rifle and waited for me to get into position. Then he set me on fire while I was being eaten. talk about adding insult to injury. That is the kind of loving relationship we have.

The Dancing Baby

2009-06-19T08:58:00.000-05:00

Lorelei like Velcro. She will undo her shoes, your shoes, a random strangers shoes. She does not like to discriminate. Diapers have Velcro of a sort on them you know. Lorelei know too. Any outfit has to either have pants or bloomers to protect her nakedness. She is crawling so pants are a bad idea unless I want the knees worn out. Dresses are not made for crawling as they tend to get in the way. The only bloomers I have match outfits. I just know as soon as I use them I will want to dress her up and not have the matching bloomers. How do we solve this crisis? Panties. I bought a 5 pack of Disney Princess panties to use as diaper covers. $8 for five pairs versus $15 for a single pair of cute bloomers. Much more economical. I got the idea from my aunt T. She was babysitting when Lorelei had a blowout. She couldn't find a pair of bloomers so she grabbed a pair of Rory's underwear. Worked beautifully. If you know a baby that is a diaper remover, tell his/her mom to buy some underwear diaper covers.

Lorelei is learning so much new stuff. She toys with the idea of walking on her feet. she is really good at walking on her knees. I don't think I have ever seen a baby knee walk as an alternative to regular walking. of course my child would be different. Her new favorite thing is dancing and clapping. In the van or in the house she bebops to the music.

Lorelei is all about showing us where her belly button is now. My kids sit on the floor looking at each other's belly buttons. They are sitting nicely and getting along so I let them bond. It won't last long. They will be back to tormenting one another shortly.

Did you know that your belly button is your first scar?

Inigo brought me a potato last night. We were in bed when I heard him trot in. This isn't unusual since he comes in every night once he is ready for bed. I was caught off guard when I heard a giant thunk. That was the potato hitting the hard wood floor. Guess he is not getting enough starch in his diet. I took the potato away. You never seen a pug look so stricken. He recovered fast. He is a little trooper.

dancing with the mice

2009-06-16T21:24:00.000-05:00

Posting when you are suffering from a lack of sleep is not smart. I learned my lesson when I re-read my "sheep" post. I have been a bit stressed out of late. I think we might just get this house/lease thing figured out this week. That will go a long way toward defusing my stress and returning me to my usual chipper self.

Lorelei has figured out clapping. She applauds herself for everything. It is so cute we just have to join in. She is such a little stinker. Rory was a golden child at this age. He was so sweet and peaceful. Lorelei is a spitfire in a diaper. Nothing and no one is safe. We are in for a ride with her. Rory has come into his own since his quiet baby days. He keeps up with his sister just fine. The two of them together really cement the belief that I am done having more children. What would I do with a third crazy kiddo? I know, invest in a straight jacket.

The yard critters are back. Are they mice? Are they voles? Do I care? Not really. I took the trash out yesterday and two of whatever they are went running past my bare foot. I did a nice little hopping jig. I like to entertain the neighborhood with interpretive dance. I called that particular piece "Eek!" As long as Mickey and Minnie stay outside until we move we will get along.

Send me sheep!

2009-06-13T01:42:00.001-05:00

Why am I blogging at 1:42 AM? Insomnia. The lovely head cold that Rory gave Lorelei was passed to me. This began a cycle of odd sleep patterns that have finally caught up with me. Not to mention stress about the house, packing, moving, and the state of the union.
Eh, maybe not that last one so much. I am pretty numb to that right now. Gotta prioritize, ya know.
Inigo is glaring at me with is little pug eyes. I am disturbing his nap time. His snoring bothers mine. What's a pug mom to do? I surrender. Off to count sheep.

Chin up baby

2009-06-08T09:53:00.000-05:00

In response to my horrible weekend Parker sent me a link in my email to cheer me up.
Chin Up from the movie Charlotte's Web.
I have the best buddies. Thanks girls for all the well wishes and prayers. I appreciate them and you more than you know!

Bad Weekend

2009-06-07T17:35:00.000-05:00

This weekend was major bad for my family. Lorelei has been under the weather but that isn't even a blip on the radar currently.

Wednesday evening we noticed a smell that was none too pleasing. I cleaned the kitchen, the trash can, dishwasher, and disposal. Still the smell remained. Friday evening we located the smell and its cause. In the kitchen we have no cabinet doors. Don't ask, long story. There is one cabinet that is never used due to its awkward location. The cats like to use is for a hidey hole. Yes that little kernel of dread that has developed in the pit of your stomach is correct. The smell was one of my Aunt B's cats. Dead. George bit the dust hard core. J chimes in with "I thought I smelled death." Ever the observant commentator.

You think that was bad. It gets worse.

Monday was the day we were supposed to close on Mom's house in Texas. Notice all the past tense in that sentence. The buyer backed out two. days. before. closing.
Pardon me, I have to climb up on the roof and do a belly flop on a rake.
*sigh
No worries. I am not the suicidal type. Low pain threshold. However I am not above a little homicide so the rake and I might be taking the train to Texas. I kid...maybe...
This puts a HUGE Godzilla size kink in our plans. I might be working on a temp solution so pray HARD for it to work out. We are looking for another buyer in Texas. The Ex-buyers were the first people to look at it after the new floors were installed so we are praying for a fast resolution to the lack of buyer. Just a lot of stress right now.
Did I mention Lorelei is sick? Yep. So even if I manage to forget all the rest of the drama I still have icky baby. She was so kind to share it with me also. I am showing the signs of her cold. Yippee skippee.

Since I need something to make me smile you get the picture below.

Go back to bed!

2009-06-04T08:04:00.000-05:00

Rory has figured out that he can get out of his room at will. He knows better than to pop out at nap time or bedtime. Doesn't stop him from opening the door, barking a request, then slamming the door closed. Usually the request is "can I get out?"
Unlike his mother Rory is not much of a sleeper. He can be heard singing or playing several hours after he has been put to bed. Nap time is always a will he/won't he guessing game. As long as he stays in his room quietly for the allotted amount of time I am cool with the no napping thing. The past two mornings Rory has started his day at 7 AM. A loud three year old running two dogs back and forth down the hall is kind of hard to ignore. Lorelei and I are forced out of bed far earlier than we would like.
So tempting to put the childproof doorknob thing back on.

Tylenol, take me away.

2009-05-29T10:55:00.000-05:00

Stress! I hate stress. Chaos is okay but stress is icky. House hunting for us, selling the TX house, trying to figure out what goes and what gets trashed/donated. Major headache. I am not prone to headaches. I am keeping Tylenol in business lately. The light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter. I've been assured it is not an oncoming train.
We found our house. We close on July 1st. Sooner if we can get all our ducks in a row neatly. I am hoping for the neat ducks. The house belonged to some friends of ours that moved to Hungary. It is nice to be helping out a friend while getting what we want. Talk about having your cake and eating it too!

Rory and Lorelei have declared sibling war. He growls at her and yells "No Ma'am!". Can't imagine where he might have heard that said. Lorelei is trying to walk but finds our hard wood floors not to her liking. We took her to a friend's house that had carpet and she really showed us what she can do. I think once we get moved in she is going to take off.
Star Trek, and Drag me to Hell. Terminator 4 was much more keeping with the first two films than that train wreck Terminator 3 was. Christian Bale did a good John Connor. Kind of sounded like batman a few times though.

Star Trek was great! Cannot even talk about it for fear of spoiling. I hope they decide to do more.

Drag me to hell. Hmm, can we say scary? Yea I was a bit jumpy afterward. I went with Parker to see this. She screamed, I grabbed her leg, we held hands. We are grown women who NEVER do those things in films. It gets our seal of approval.

"WOW!"

2009-05-09T17:57:00.000-05:00

Will work for Sushi

2009-05-09T17:49:00.001-05:00

I love sushi. My brother in law is responsible. We were at a Shoguns of Japan Steakhouse for his 21st bday. He ordered so much sushi it was ridiculous. I did not see the check, just my part of the pot for his tab. It was very not pretty. Anyways, we all ate some. It was my first time and I was sure I wouldn't like it. I like rare steak so I am not sure why raw fish was messing with my head. I was in heaven. I tried a bit of everything. I like it all. The dilemma now is that good sushi is pricey. You either have to survive on a sampling once in a great while or brave the cheap stuff. If I have to get my fix I have found a cheap but tasty (and safe) place to get it. There is a difference though. Maybe it is a girl thing. Hershey's chocolate is great. I love it. But get me a bar of Godiva and I cherish it. We know that the more expensive stuff is a better selection. Therefore we want it over the more affordable although just as tasty stuff. Maybe I need more therapy? Same thing with shoes.

Inner Beauty is better than bad bloggers

2009-05-07T14:05:00.001-05:00

I am going to have to weigh in on the Miss California debacle. I think it is a shame that she was penalized for giving her answer truthfully. When did saying you do not believe gay marriage become social suicide? Why was that question even asked? Does Miss America really do much lobbying in congress during her reign? From what i have heard reported she was not going to win anyway. She was behind in the swimsuit and one other category. What i find silly is how many people associated with her felt the need to contact the media to throw her under the bus. reminds me of grade school. remember when a rumor went around about one person and suddenly all his/her friends took a step back to say "we are not with that person. Don't even know 'em."
When she spoke she spoke for Carrie Prejean, the girl who scored the highest in the Miss California pageant. Not all of California, it's people, business, governments, etc. The California Pageant had to say how "disappointed" they were in Prejean. Shana Moakler spoke up about how saddened she was. Hello? Who cares? Not like USA was going to boycott California because of her answer. Chill out. I had to give her credit for giving the answer that was true to her heart in that moment. She could have lied. She knew she was gonna tank after that.
What is with Perez Hilton and his huge monster hissy fit? She didn't say what he wanted to hear so she deserves to be blasted with crude epitaphs all over the web and on TV? Equality and free speech unless you disagree with me? Have your opinion but have some class as well. No one needs to hear all the profanity and slurs to get that you are passionate about your point. Guess what? I do not believe in gay marriage. I only believe in marriage where God blesses the union. read the bible, God ain't too keen on the same sex unions. Not going to argue with any one about my opinion. The lifestyle you live is yours. My beliefs are mine. The same bible that taught me this also taught me to be kind and love all of God's children. So we might not believe the same things but I still love you as one of God's children.
As to the current events...
They have found pics of her she had taken nude. That goes against her contract and I believe she should have her crown stripped for that. As a potential role model I can get behind her being brave enough to be honest even in unfavorable conditions. I cannot condone pics in the nude.

Walk my way unless your name is Inigo; HE needs to stay in the dang yard!

2009-05-07T10:11:00.000-05:00

Look who is off and (trying) to walk! Little Miss Lorelei! She is not so fond of the grass. The first time she felt it on her bare feet was awful. She has warmed up to it since then. As long as she is moving it is okay. Sit her down and her mood deteriorates rapidly. Rory was the same way at her age. He is all about getting in the grass now. Anything to get filthy from head to toe he is down for.
Last night as I began setting out pots and pans to cook dinner my cell phone rang. It was the Home Again pet people. "I have a lady on the phone who has your dog." I was a bit surprised. To my knowledge I had my dog. Apparently I was mistaken. Sure enough Inigo was down the road on his back getting a tummy rub in this woman's driveway. She had spotted him in her rear view mirror chasing her SUV. Pugs - all energy, no common sense. He saw me and just kind of looked like "Oh hey Mom. Where did you come from?" This is why I spent the extra $13 to get him the fancy engraved tag for his collar with his name and ID#. It has a big Home Again logo on the opposite side. To me this says, "I get around. My owner is confident I will disappear on her more than once."
This was taken about 8:45 last night. He looks bushed. Lorelei was eating cheerios out of a tupperware bowl not even a foot from him. He didn't even try to sniff them. Those neighborhood adventures take a lot out of a pooch.

Hair no more

2009-05-06T19:51:00.000-05:00

Never, NEVER make your wife angry and then hand her a pair of electric hair clippers. All the ranting will prevent her from paying attention. she will not notice that the guard is off. The assumption that you want her to check for any uneven spots might be made. Now you have a a bald spot the approximate size of a playing card on the side of your head. This might have happened at my house.

Okay so it did happen. I swear I would never mangle a persons physical appearance on purpose. Being a woman I understand how important hair is. J's will look normal again in two weeks but right now he is bald. Completely. I tried to fix it. Just kept getting worse. I apologized profusely. J is a handsome man no matter how he wears his hair but bald is not his best style.

In other news... THE TX HOUSE SOLD!!!!
We close June 16. As soon as that is over we will talk to a loan officer about pre-approval and then find our new(bigger) home. PRAY that everything goes through!

Sassy's Bows

2009-04-30T19:43:00.000-05:00

My BFF is thinking about opening a store on Ebay or Etsy. I am all for it. She is super talented as you can see. 99% of all the bows I have for Lorelei were made by Sassy. I swear she just keeps getting better at making boutique bows. I hope that soon I will be able to put a button that links to her shop!

She just bought a huge lot of various solid colors and polka dot ribbon. I was digging through it today. So many possibilities for awesome bows!

She is thinking about expanding to do corkers, wipe case covers, bow holders, and knit hats with the gerber daisies.

Isn't that little ribbon flower so cute?

Another cute ribbon flower creation.

We've Sprung

2009-04-29T19:23:00.000-05:00

Mom came back from TX with sidewalk chalk for Rory. He loves being able to color on the driveway. Fans of the series Heroes might notice the heroes sign I drew. Its everywhere. its everywhere!
Lorelei had some fun making some chicken scratch with a yellow piece. As you can see I had some fun too! Kind of felt like i was back in high school scribbling I love J on the front of my notebooks in bubble letters.
My wisteria has finally bloomed. Only took 3 years to happen! Speaking of spring our doves are back. Every year we get a mating pair that builds a nest in the front yard. I think they must trust us an awful lot to leave them be because last year any time Mom and Dad went out to get dinner they left jack and judy sitting on our welcome mat. A welcome mat that doesn't say welcome but rather Beware of Cat. Kind of funny to see two baby doves sleeping cuddled together on a mat speaking about the evil cats indoors.
Our ducks are back too. They frequent the area and call a lot of places home but we usually see the same male and female wander through our yard several times in the spring. Today they had flown over our fence into the backyard. Bad place to be. Inigo was really looking forward to a play date with them. I coaxed them back over the fence where it is safer.

This is the only time Rory is allowed to push his sister.

Wonder what they are both pointing at?

That would be Daddy riding on Rory's power wheels Harley Davidson.

Not a fan of sports

2009-04-28T16:36:00.000-05:00

The pitter patter of little rollers. Well, it is more like a rushing sounds than a patter. Lorelei loves her walker. We renamed it a runner since she seldom walks in it. Reverse is a favorite direction for her. She can whip that thing around 180 degrees in less then 2 seconds I swear! I think she is going to win NASCAR someday. That will kind of suck for J and I since we do not participate in the national pastime of watching sports. We all make exceptions were are kids are concerned though. If we ever have kids on the same teams, you will be able to spot us. We will be the ones that look confused or ready to die from boredom anytime our kids are not looking our way. Rory watched a little bit of baseball over at a friends house the other evening. He was pretty interested in it. So glad we have friends that like sports. Our kids will need you to become well rounded human beings. I understand the concept of sports. I just do not like to participate. My kids are welcome to. I encourage them to. They just won't get any sort of super genes from me that will help them become super athletes. Super wise crackers perhaps.

Not a Culinary Genius

2009-04-25T19:58:00.000-05:00

Cooking is not something I do for fun. My best friend makes the most exotic sounding meals to me. She says they are easy but I do not think our culinary skills are on the same level. Like my Mom she watches a lot of cooking shows and loves to find new recipes. I only look when i have exhausted my knowledge of how to cook hamburger meat in 20 minutes or less. Like today. I tried a baked ziti recipe that was very tasty and simple to make. One problem though. The penne pasta didn't get as soft as it should have. I will add more water next time and let it cook that extra five minutes. I prefer to bake. Not very good at that either but it is more fun. Anything that is that bad for your figure is more fun to make. i love to make Paula Deen's Granite Steps Blueberry Coffee Cake. It is great to take to potlucks and such. People love it!

Ingredients

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted

1 12-ounce can buttermilk biscuits

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 cup packed light brown sugar
1 cup quick-cooking rolled oats
1 1/2 cup fresh or frozen blueberries
1/2 cup granulated sugar

Directions

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Generously grease a 9-inch square baking dish. In a small bowl, combine brown sugar and cinnamon and mix well with a fork. Separate biscuit dough into 10 biscuits. Cut each biscuit into quarters, and dip each piece in melted butter and coat with brown sugar mixture. Arrange in a single layer in baking dish. Sprinkle with 1/2 cup of the oats. Combine blueberries and granulated sugar in a bowl and toss to coat. Spoon over oats and biscuits and sprinkle with remaining 1/2 cup oats. Drizzle melted butter on top. Bake for 20 minutes or until cake is golden brown and center is done. Cool for 20 minutes. Serve warm.

Yield: 6-8 servings
Prep time: 10-15 minutes
Inactive prep time: 20 minutes
Cook time: about 20 minutes
Ease of preparation: moderately easy

You can get a step by step tutorial with pictures from Chelsea Morning's Blog. This is where I first found it. It is such a decadent dessert. I hope you bake it!

It's my party so I can blog if I want to.

2009-04-23T19:36:00.000-05:00

It's my party! We didn't really have a party. We did have a cake though. Granted I bought, baked, iced, and decorated it myself but since I get to eat it I am not complaining. We do plan to go out to dinner soon once Mom gets back. We are going to the new Japanese steakhouse. I am 25 today. I felt funny about it for half a second since it signals the end of my early twenties before I smacked some sense into myself. I do not believe in feeling bad about growing older. The alternative is death so I want every birthday I can get! I plan to dance a merry jig on my 80th birthday. Age is relative, so bring on the candles!

Radio Rant

2009-04-22T09:50:00.000-05:00

My computer speakers died. The sub woofer (? is that right?) that sits on the floor fried. I smelled electrical smoke and heard some crackling as I checked my email the other day. My investigations led me to the sub woofer. I pulled the plug which burned my finger cause it was smoking hot! Now I am without my computer play list. I am forced to listen to the radio. *cringe
The radio is fine for short trips in the car but not all. day. long.We all know that they play the same set of songs over and over with a few oldies thrown in to put you off the scent. Not to mention I am not a fan of all the music that is played. I am pretty eclectic and love a wide variety of music. In my home I prefer to listen to sets that I know I will dig all the music. every song. If I put my play list on shuffle the first five songs are:

I Caught Myself by Paramore
Undo Me by Jennifer Knapp
Hysteria by Muse
Better in Time by Leona Lewis
Turn the Page by Metallica

I have Garth Brooks, Dwight Yoakam, The Cranberries, Apocalyptica, My Chemical ROmance, Sarah MacLachlan, Sean Paul, The Veronicas, Stabbing Westward, Queen, Collective Soul, Mudvayne, Lily Allen, Jason Mraz, Adema, Duran Duran, Theory of a Deadman, Seether, Todd Agnew, Faith Hill, and oh so many more. My play list grows all the time.
Country, Pop, Classical, Rock, R&B, Christian, Techno, Alternative, I like a little of it all. I will admit my heart belongs to rock n' roll. If I had to spend the rest of my life only listening to one genre it would be rock. I love to his shuffle and just spend the day jamming as I go about my daily business.
Save me from hearing the same crap over and over. Yesterday I heard three different Kanye West songs in the same hour. NEXT ARTIST PLEASE! My brain is beginning to hurt due to the repetition. And what is with all the chatter? I have XM for a reason. No commercials. In my mind that means no talking. I do not care if Lindsay Lohan was seen at some club or what Jennifer Garner went to the Doctor for. They have websites for that if you just have to know. Radio = Music. Play some! Thankfully J is got us a new setup. Just in time too. If I have to hear T.I. ft Justin Timberlake one more time I might be Dead and Gone!

Return of the Mothership

2009-04-21T09:21:00.000-05:00

Mom returns from TX this weekend! She finished having all new flooring, two new water heaters, fresh paint, and a new dishwasher installed on her TX house that we are trying to sell. All those improvements are hopefully going to get us a buyer soon! Sadly she will miss my birthday by just a few days. At (almost) 25 this is not s huge deal but it is nice to have the one responsible for giving you life around on the anniversary of that occasion. Mom is going to feed my addiction to reading my letting me pick out some E-books for my Sony E Reader she got me last year. I really do have too many books. I don't think this is a problem but others disagree. If I only had a few books I would hyperventilate. What if I run out of reading material and I am forced to read the shampoo bottle? Mom is my enabler, bless her.
I picked out my present from J and informed him of the charge to his credit card. It is a super cute wristlet I found on Etsy. I posted a pic of it above. This is his preferred method of shopping for me. Two Christmas' ago I left it up to him and wound up with bupkis. Lesson learned. For a man who will not shop for holidays he does a great job with little surprises the rest of the year. Last week I was gifted with a Nintendo DS that he had been given in pieces. Wonder Geek can do anything so this was a piece of cake. I told him he did a great job and should consider doing his own holiday shopping. He is just insecure in his ability to pick out gifts. I got a whole raised eyebrow out of him so I am going to guess that was a no.

Felt Flowers for my Darling

2009-04-20T15:43:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago I won a drawing and received the most fabulous hair accessory for Miss Lorelei. Of course I get the cutest bow and L decides she wants to rip all head ware out! Just figures. I want to thank Marta over at the Haus of Girls for making such a wonderful work of art. I encourage everyone to go to her Etsy Store. These felt flowers clips are going to be all the rage soon and won't you be sad if you are left out.I have been looking for one of those cutesy flowers to go on her knit hat. This is WAY better than the ones I found! L has a big head, bless her heart. The hat is for a big girl so she will get some actual use out of it. Probably next year too!
I had to put the hat on her head with one hand, then snap the picture before she figured out what happened. I clipped the flower on her ponytail the other day. She has enough hair for a ponytail but they are not so pretty right now she we rarely do them. She instantly went after the bow. J says my eyes bugged out of my head. I dashed over and took the bow out to check if she had damaged it. I must have resembled Gollum from the Lord of the Rings movies with my precious!I swear this picture was snapped like 4 secconds after the one above. She is quick. I was trying to get a second pic with it on. No luck there.

Tough Questions

2009-04-16T18:26:00.001-05:00

After i got a very nice comment about our dear Linus from Wendy I hopped over to her blog to check it out. I found a very thought provoking post titled Tough Questions. Thank you Wendy for giving me permission to copy and paste so I could answer the tough questions myself!

Would you do crystal meth if it were legalized?
I remember my Health Teacher in high school stressing the less than pleasant side effects so I think I would still have to pass.

Abortion, for or against?
Against.

Would the country fall if there was a woman president?
I think the problem would come from other nations not recognizing a woman as our top political power.

Do you believe in the death penalty?
Yes. Lethal injection only. I think all other forms are cruel and unusual punishment. They worked when we had no better way to put a criminal to death but now they need to be retired.

Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?
Nah. I do not smoke any kind of anything.

Do you believe in God?
100%

Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized?
This answer will not be popular. I do not think that the state or government can tell you if you are married or not. I believe it is a spiritual institution between the couple and God. That said the bible tells us that God does not recognize any other union than between a man and a woman. The Government can give rights or not all day long but it is God that really matters. In my opinion legalizing same sex marriage would be pointless and a waste of time.

Do you think it's wrong so many Hispanics are moving to the USA?
No. I do think you need to enter legally or not at all. Do not be a drain on resources when you get here. For that matter the people who are already here need to not be a drain on the resources! Get a job! Support the economy!

A 12 year old girl has a baby...should she keep it?
12 is a baby herself. She is not capable of raising another human being.

Should the alcohol drinking age be lowered to 18?
No. At 18 the maturity level is better but not where it needs to be for responsible drinking. The extra 3 years will hopefully change that.

Should the war in Iraq be called off?
I don't know. I can see what the news reports and such but what do the top military guys know that we do not? Is it tactically a good idea to pull out? I don't have enough information to answer that.

Assisted suicide is legal...do you agree?
No. If you are gung ho to end your life then you do not need to pull someone else into it. I think that suicide is wrong.

Do you believe in spanking your children?
Beating them, no. But I do believe a spanking is deserved for those times when it is imperative you learn the lesson the first time. Like say we do not run in the street because car might hit us. There is a difference between delivering discipline and abusing a child.

Would you burn the American flag for a million dollars?
No. Too much respect for what it stands for. No amount of money is worth my own honor.

A mother is declared innocent after murdering her 5 children in a temporary insanity case...what do you think?
Then send her to a psych prison.

Mud Puppies

2009-04-13T20:26:00.000-05:00

I love the rain. I love thunderstorms. In the past few years that love has been tested.

1. Rory's fear of rain and thunder. We have recently been making progress with that. He knows the rain is needed to give the birds a bath and the flowers a drink. The thunder is the clouds laughing. Clouds are so big that when they laugh it sounds big and scary. What are the clouds laughing at? The lighting told a joke.

2. Our neighborhood has very old power lines. Big storms tend to knock the power out sometimes for days. Thankfully the power company has been working on replacing them. Good thing since storm season is about to hit for another year.

3. My floors. J and I removed the carpet in our house and replaced them with wood laminate. See how pretty it is?

Our backyard had an above ground pool in the center when the previous owners lived here. We have tried to get grass to grow every summer but it has never lasted very long. When it rains we have a nice pretty lake in the backyard.

Even in the rain, a puppy has to pee.
Our first mud puppy, Inigo. He likes to fun through puddles. He even painted on my sliding glass window. Such a thoughtful canine. That tennis ball is # 1152. He goes through them like tissue.

Our second mud puppy, Linus. It is not his fault he has huge paws. They just soak up mud and water to be deposited on other surfaces. He has the sweetest face doesn't he?

This is my pretty floor after I let the dogs back in the house. So thankful I do not have carpet. It still pains me to see the floor I cleaned less than 24hrs ago in such a state.
The rain has let up. Today was very nice and sunny. My floor is clean and shiny. All is well with my soul. Too bad the weekend forecast calls for more rain. A vicious cycle.

Jeep brought to you by Star Trek

2009-04-13T11:24:00.001-05:00

I think Rory gets his random funny comments from his father's genetics. Rory is not a joker like me. He might grow into it someday but I think he is going to be like J. He is in every other way. J cannot tell a joke to save his life. His retelling of a funny story is down right painful. Every now and then though he pops out these little comedic gems that knock me for a loop. Last night I was trying to install a new game on the laptop in the living room. J was in the recliner next to mine playing Far Cry on the PS3. I happened to look up at the same time J attempted to run his jeep into the base of a mountain.

Me: "That is not going to work. Mountain are like walls, only meaner."

J: "Yea I know. The jeep wasn't built my Star Trek."

Me: (confused) "What do you mean?"

J: "It doesn't boldly go where no jeep has gone before."

Rory has started the mine phase. It is exhausting. Lorelei has started to be more independent and take care of herself. Now when Rory hollers "Mine!" at her or "Go away Lawlie!" or my favorite "Leave my Rory lone!" she reacts in a fashion we are not used to. Usually in her walker when these incidents happen she gives a war cry and torpedo's towards him. Her goal is to flatten him into a speed bump. The coming years should prove interesting. I am sensing a lot of time out, grounding, and spankings in their future.
I have been telling him that she was going to catch up and retaliate for the last 365 days of her existence. He did not believe me that she was keeping score. She is my daughter after all. I know how her mind works. When he least expects it, she will bring the pain.
So that is my midget war at home. How is your family doing?

Potty later

2009-04-12T15:06:00.000-05:00

Rory and I were talking about the potty yesterday. I am determined to get him potty trained. He has zero interest in it. The conversation went something like this...

Me: See your elmo seat on the big potty? Don't you want to be a big boy like Daddy and go to the bathroom on your elmo seat instead of that baby diaper?

Rory: Daddy uses the big potty.

Me: Yes he does. Don't you want to use the big potty and be Mommy's big boy?

Rory: Later Mommy, later.

What do you say to that?

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

2009-04-09T09:02:00.000-05:00

The time is 9:02 AM on April 9th, 2009. At this one year ago I was on my way to the OB praying to hear "Your dilated enough to be admitted for delivery!"
Alas it was not so. However stripping my membranes (sounds gross huh?) did start a domino effect that produced a beautiful baby girl we call Lorelei by 10:07 PM that night. I will skip the details of delivery cause let's face it, besides other mom's no one is interested.

The proof that our hard work had, er...paid off

Lorelei Ann born 10:07 PM 7Ilbs, 7ozs & 21 inches long

First time she saw herself in a mirror. She was delighted to see such a friendly face smiling back at her.

Hugging her stuffed cow during nap time. 0-3 mos.

Showing off her new girly hair accessories. 3-6 mos.

Cutie Pie! 6-9 mos.

Loving her Daddy. 9-12 mos

It has been a wonderful year filled with new adventures and at time less than happy moments. Seems to have flown by. Rory's first year did not sneak up on me as fast as this. I wouldn't trade a single minute of it. The good, the bad, or the colicky!

April 8th, 2009
Opening her Easter bucket with Mommy.

Servolution

2009-04-08T15:52:00.000-05:00

Our troops do so much for our country. Agree with the war effort or do not but that fact remains. After long separations with their spouses it can be easy to forget to take the time to just be a couple again. With the gift baskets we made they get to have at least one date night.

Five of ten that where made. Each basket had two movie passes and one give certificate for dinner, and a combination of candles, lotion, massage oil, free Joe's Crab Shack appetizer, nail file, foot salve, bath fizzes, pair of patriotic earrings, makeup brushes in a carry pouch, and a thank you card for all they sacrifice for America.

Parker, Me, and Shelly. This was after we filled the first five one Sunday afternoon over at Shelly's house. She even made brownies for us. Such a sweetie my Shell Bell. Bradford could not be there as she was preparing a last minute trip home for the funeral of her Grandfather.

On the top is actually my good friend Hollin and her youngest of three kiddos. That is going to be his Easter basket once his mommy takes all her goodies out of it! Her hubby will be back from in July. They are planning a big trip to WDW after he returns.

On the bottom is R and her two gorgeous girls. Bradford threw her name into the hat as another woman who could use a little uplifting. She is a very tiny woman but so full of joy! Not only has she been taking care of her two munchkins but she runs a home daycare on the base! She helps out a lot of Servicemen and women everyday. Her husband is still currently deployed. Please keep him in your prayers!

Now we have M on the top. For a while it seemed we were destined to be two ships passing in the night! We played a lot of phone tag. In the end we managed to meet up so I could hand off her basket. Such a pretty young woman. Can you tell she just left a spinning class? I wish I looked that fresh and put together after a work out!

On the bottom is S. Another woman who is a real asset to the USAF. She also does the home daycare thing on base. The state and the base are both very strict with these ladies. It takes an amazing person to meet all the requirements and do such a fantastic job with our children. What a blessing they are!

Both of their husbands are still currently deployed. Please keep them in your prayers!

Mr. and Mrs S.
I was so excited that I caught a husband back from a recent deployment and at home. The fact that he was still in his uniform was just icing on the cake! You know those smiles are not for me. They are there because of how happy they are to be together again! I am so happy that they are going to have a chance to go out on the town soon for dinner and a movie!

This project has been such a blessing in my life. Five other women got baskets. One was delivered to a couple that had been back together for a week after an 18month separation. Each of these ten ladies had a different story that touched me profoundly. I think this is the part where I want to thank all the people and places that made this dream a reality.

Ryan who is the General Manager at Wehrenberg Theaters. He donated over $180 in free movie tickets!
Applebees
17th St. Grill
54th Street Grill
Chevy's Fresh Mex
Joe's Crab Shack
and Smokey Bones

And of course Grace Church, Bradford, Shelly, Parker, and Haseman! If I forgot someone I am so sorry, please do not be offended. I could not have done it with out you!

Maybe they are not so bad after all...

2009-04-07T15:00:00.000-05:00

Quick note then on to the real post...
I finally broke down and watched Juno last night. I fast forwarded some. All in all it was a sweet movie about teenage pregnancy and adoption. I was really touched by the letter Juno leaves for adoptive Mom Vanessa (the one Vanessa frames). If you haven't seen it then I am not going to spoil it. If you have didn't that just hit you right in the heart? All I am going to say about that.

tarantulaguy1976's
My vote is not in favor of spiders. That being said I would like to say I have evolved a bit concerning them. My previous stance was total eradication. God created all his creatures for a reason as I have come to better understand. On YouTube I have been watching a guy who owns, breeds, and sells tarantulas. This man and his whole family care deeply for these critters and it shows. They have a huge spider named Zilla. She earned that name folks. Baby girl is one big creepy crawly! Lots of informative videos and tutorials. The thing that stuck out to me was a video that shows a T that has found himself stuck in molt (when they shed to grow). In the wild he would die or get eaten. Lucky for him he has such a nice man looking out for him. It was very delicate surgery but the two were extracted and all was well minus an injury that could not be avoided. Another video of a spider's egg sac being extracted was heartbreaking. The mother fought to give up her babies to be and then was devastated when they were gone. She looked all around her tank for the egg sac. I did not know that they were such good mommies. It had to be done and is part of the process for breeding but her "Daddy" was very upset that he made her so sad.

Do I like spiders in my house? No. Do I want to see anything suffer? Absolutely not! My tastes might run to the furry but with fewer legs as pets but even I can see the beauty in these huge arachnids. So as long as we can remain on opposite sides of the glass (same with snakes, lizards, scorpions, etc.) then I think we have an understanding.
Hats off to Tarantulaguy1976's and his wonderful family for doing a job I never could and doing so well!
Long live Zilla! I plan to keep an eye on her to see how big she gets!

I will not be rethinking how I feel about sharks so don't even ask.

Back to Business

2009-04-05T18:16:00.000-05:00

I pride myself on being less delusional than the average human being when it comes to my own short comings. I do not see them all but I think the vast majority are documented. My new found need to become a Martha Stewart housekeeper is a huge improvement on my normal domestic skills. Martha would still have a cow at the lack of organization but I do not cringe when someone shows up on my doorstep. The recent bout of illness that swept through my house took no prisoners. I fell of the wagon and had to start over. Didn't have to worry about anyone in my house since we were all viral time bombs nut with the crises averted it is back to business as usual. The house smells like a pine forest now. Reminds me of TX without all the allergies.

Mom, Aunt B, and GG are in TX as we speak trying to fix a few details that are holding up the sale of Mom's house. I am taking advantage of the absence of extra bodies. Besides a good scrubby I plan to ditch, organize, and simplify. I have never been a minimalist but as my children grow so do the amount of stuff they own. Since I am not uber rich I cannot afford a house for each of us so I must streamline all the unused and uneeded junk that piles up so quickly. One thing this recent mass cohabitation with my extended family has taught me is that I could not be a mother of many. Kate Gosselin and that woman with the 18 kids whose name escapes, hats off to you ladies! I do not have your strength.

April fools

2009-04-03T20:26:00.000-05:00

April first is known as April Fool's Day. People make it a mission to play joke and pranks of others. Once in Junior High my best friend expressed her undying love for me in a more than platonic way. At the bottom of the letter was P.S. April fools written in teeny tiny script. It was the one and only joke that has ever been played on me for this historic day of jokes. This year the cosmos got in on the action. I kid. It was just a day full of bad coincidences for me.

First the Postal service has raised the price of the stamp. Grrr. I send a lot of paperback books by mail. It is part of the online swap I am a member of. This causes me to use a lot of stamps. The average book uses six stamps to mail. I use 100 stamps just about every 2 weeks. It is still cheaper to use the online swap than to buy the books new but at this rate it won't last long.

After my trip to the USPS I went to walmart. Walking down the Easter aisle I slipped and barely caught myself before I landed bottom first in a lovely puddle of vomit. My first thought was that some one had walked off and left it for some unsuspecting person to step in. As I began to insert my foot in my mouth a flustered mother comes over with a teary eyed toddler in her cart. She had gone to alert a store manager about the problem and had returned to the scene to keep watch over it. Now I just feel like a heel. I made some quick small talk and wished her well.

Got my groceries and left the store to find my car in the parking lot. Two other women were behind me. We had parked across the aisles from one another. I was right next to the cart return. After filling my trunk and putting my cart back I got in the car. Threw it into reverse and my back up sensors began to wail. I couldn't see anything on my cameras so I slowly began to ease back. The woman across the aisle had put her cart behind my car. I had to get out and move it before I was able to drive away. How you could be so blatantly rude is beyond me.

How was your april fools?

No Obama but here are the rest!

2009-04-02T09:16:00.000-05:00

My mention of Former Presidents and First Ladies in my family tree yesterday peaked the interest of a few. If you are curious which Presidents/First Ladies I claim as family you can click on here to read an old post about them. It will also tell you a few more famous or interesting people are among my relations. Mom spent a considerable amount of money and most of the year 2007 and 2008 working on our family tree. Once she got to a certain point (like 1546 AD) the website was able to show her who is who among the famous and how they got there by mapping it out person to person. It was pretty neat!

my cousin Obama?

2009-04-01T09:24:00.000-05:00

I like so many have a Facebook account. In my email this morning I found a letter stating that Barack Obama says your related. We're Related is an application I have on my account. While I am related to three former Presidents and four former First Ladies, I somehow doubt the current Mr. President and I are going to be attending the same reunions. I tried to follow the link to check it out but the applications is down. Whatcha want to bet that it is some punk kid? Strange age we live in when the President has Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, Etc.

That probably makes me sound like some one not born in the age of computers. I promise I was. I just see the irony of such a silly people meeting website including the man who runs our entire country as a member. Well I have to go. Inigo the pug with zero common sense is trying to play a rousing game of chase with Miss Kitty aka Schizo Kitty. This could end in stitches.

A.I.: The Artificial Insemination Post

2009-03-31T09:25:00.000-05:00

Not many people know this but I am a product of artificial insemination. I do not hide it. It just rarely comes up in conversation. Can you imagine trying to slip that nugget of information into the dialogue? I am sharing this here because recently I have met several couples that are finding themselves needing a little medical intervention to become pregnant. They may not be on the same path my parents took but I still felt led to share an adult view point of what it is like to be a child of such a union.

It is blessed.

In the 80's my Mom and Dad tried with gusto to conceive a child. No luck. They were each tested by the Doctors and found out that they both had a complication. Mom's was not insurmountable but would definitely make the road to motherhood bumpier. Dad's however was 100% none possibility. You see Dad was a x-ray tech in the Navy. During his training he and some buddies thought it was entertaining to x-ray random stuff. Mom remembers x-rays that came to her in the mail from Dad of watches and a dead rat they found. Did they wear those nice little lead vests? Nope. ZAP! No babies for you Mister. Hearing what they thought was the end of their journey they decided to adopt. Sadly that fell through in the delivery room when the mother decided she could not part with her child. It was very upsetting for them. So close to having their baby ( a girl ) and then once again gone.
Eventually they found themselves talking about artificial insemination. They lived in the D.C. area then. Dad's family was very concerned that he would have issues raising a child that was not biologically his. His answer was, "Any male can father a child. I am going to be a Daddy." I love that quote :0)

The second round of fertility drugs and sperm donor created me! ten months later in the year of 1984 I was born. Ultra sounds were still not widely used for the sole purpose of determining sex so they did not know if I was a boy or girl until delivery. The Doctor told them that I would be a girl. Three couples before mom and dad had come to this clinic unable to have children and all blessed with girls. He just knew I would be the fourth. Records about the donor are tightly guarded. Today it is a little easier to access for medical questions concerning paternity. All I know about my biological donor is that he was a medical student with two confirmed successes before me. The clinic only allowed for three babies from one donor so as not to populate the area with siblings. However nothing stopped him from moving on to the next donation clinic in the are. Med school is pricey and the clinics paid very well.

I was not told the particulars of my conception until I was a teenager. It was actually an accident that i found out at all. At the time I was watching my whole world fall apart due to my parent's divorce. I was unsure of myself and my father's love for me. When the truth came to light about the artificial insemination I was so happy. Not only did my parents want me they worked hard to have me. Time, money, tests, stress it all was worth it to them to have me. No DNA bound me to my father but he was there at every little league game to watch his cheerleader. He was always at every event, play, and program. Our relationship was far from perfect but until the day he died in 2005 he was always a constant in my life. I have no doubt that I was the most important person in the world to him. Any my mother? Well she has always been my best friend but never at the expense of being my parent first. She is in every thing that I do. Every decision I make. My true north to guide me in the direction I should go.

My life isn't perfect. My childhood was not a fairy tale. I have flaws and issues like anybody else. My place on this earth has never been a question to me. I am here because I was wanted more. I was prayed for. And God answers prayers.

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened ‘ (Matthew 7:7, 8).

P.S. It has been brought to my attention that some folks find the term "Artificial" insemination offensive. Personally I think it is silly. It is not a term to say that the child is artificial. The way that the sperm is introduced to the body is artificial. See not so offensive? Just my 2 cents.

What would you do?

2009-03-30T20:32:00.001-05:00

Last week I was reading one of the parenting magazines I subscribe to and they had a poll about whether or not a parent should lie for their child. I do not like liars. I teach my children that lies are sins. That said I participate in the traditions of Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy. SO where does the line get drawn in the sand? At the ages of 3 and 11 months I have not had any real need to lie for my children.

Here is a story from my childhood. When I was a sophomore in high school I started skipping school with J's brother. I would go over to their house and spend the day with J when he did not have to work. Of course I thought i was so very clever and that my mother would never find out. She might not have found out as soon as she did had the school not called home to check on me. I know for a fact that she would have found out eventually. I subscribe to the thought that you reap what you sow and all deceptions will come to light. Mom covered for me and told them that I was with my father that day. If she had told them that I was in fact skipping school I would have been suspended for 3 days. To my mother this was not punishment but vacation. She waited for me to get home and asked me about my day. I dug my own grave. It was big enough to be a mass grave to tell you the truth.
The punishment I received from mom was worse than anything the school cold have given me. See my mother knew me well. She knew how I ticked and what made me who I was. Therefore she knew how to inflict the most pain with the least amount of effort. Weeks later it got back to me that several ladies at the school were talking about how awful it was that my mother would lie for me. I was so mad. How dare they talk about my mother? They had no proof she was covering for me. But whose fault was it that this was even happening? Mine. I was so ashamed of myself for causing a hit to my mother's reputation that I never skipped school again.
(The month of Saturdays I had to spend in detention to make up for all the days I missed didn't hurt as a deterrent either)

Did my mother do the right thing by me? I can't say that I think it was the right thing if we are talking definite black and white sides of the law. It did teach me the best lesson that I could have learned. So would you lie for your child?

Cat Scratch

2009-03-27T09:27:00.000-05:00

Rory had a close encounter of the feline kind. If you use your imagination you can kind of make out the path the paw swiped at him. In defense of our kitties, if ever a child pestered the crap out of an animal and deserved a little retribution it is Rory. He is not mean to them. He does not hurt them. He is just a pest. He like to play follow the leader. This does not amuse the cat. He likes to hug the kitty. Again, not amused. He likes to sit in his Daddy's lap even though the cat was there first. The cat is not amused and pushed off a comfy lap. In spite of this we have mostly tolerant cats. I say mostly because two of them are totally anti child. Pickles refuses to get out of the line of fire but yowls until rescued. Miss Kitty is normally camouflaged somewhere trying to be invisible but WILL tear you a new one if you touch her without permission. To this day only a few people have ever received permission other than me, her mommy. The cat that inflicted the damage was the most tolerant (of kids) and best mothering cat I know.
Clio must have either been startled or Rory hugged a bit too hard. One reason why we do not encourage people/animal hugging in our home. She swiped, he screamed. She must have known that she just did something bad cause she looked over her shoulder at J and then high tailed it to hide under our bed. I wouldn't have punished the cat. Rory knows better than to pester the cats. We have been going over it since before he understood what was being said to him. Some things just have to be learned the hard way. This is not our first adventure into the medical treatment of cat scratches. I doubt it will be the last. Should be a few months at least. Clio and Rory have made up since "the incident". They even shared Daddy's lap the other night. Progress maybe? We shall see.

Paper Shredder

2009-03-25T17:11:00.001-05:00

I don't usually let her play with paper. She has that bad baby habit of putting everything in her mouth. I cannot stand to watch any one chew on paper. It all goes back to grade school when i had a teacher tell us that paper comes from trees and dogs pee on trees. I never looked at a sheet of paper the same way again. When the Dell magazine came in I decided to let her have at it as long as I supervised. Not like we could afford anything from dell right now anyways.

Shake, shake, shake and the cover came flying off. The game was on then. Pages began to fly like confetti.
A tiny corner tore off and she realized that the big pieces could be made into tiny pieces.
Of course her squeals of delight attracted her big brother. he proceeded to take her tiny piece away. You can see she is attempting to reach for it back.
And denied by Rory. Doesn't she look perplexed. "Why did I loose my toys? Why won't he give it back?" Rory is going to rue this day when Lorelei learns to fight for her right to party.

Hair raising tale

2009-03-24T15:31:00.000-05:00

There is Lorelei doing with her breakfast. You might have to look hard to see but the hair on the back of her head is sticking straight up. My Mother's hair looks like that every morning too. Since the Aunts and GG have moved in I have noticed that they also have this vertical hairdo in the AM. Must be maternal genetics that skipped a generation because I do not have this issue.

Here is the view from the back of Miss Lorelei's ever so stylish morning coiffure. Don't you wish you had her stylist? I think the length of my hair contributed to my lack of crazy hair. I just got it whacked off to right below my shoulders last Friday so I might be joining the ranks if I am not careful. Karma is tricky like that. I said good bye to around six inches of hair on the salon floor. I needed a change.
Last Thursday at Sassy's we tried pigtails out for the first time. I do not think that they are the cutest thing I have ever seen on her but you have to admit the little imp looks pretty stinkin cute. The way they are angled reminds me of antennas on a bug. My mother didn't like my comparison. How dare I call her sweet baby girl a bug! Funny I thought I was her sweet baby girl. Oh right, I was replaced. I keep forgetting that...
The hair on top of her head is long but shorter and thick in the back. This sort of makes her look like she has a reverse mullet. Babies can get away with that sort of thing though. If it looks too ridiculous people just blame the parents. Seeing as how I am the one who inflicted any hair style my children have on them I can take the heat for it.

Claritin take me away!

2009-03-21T16:04:00.000-05:00

Spring has sprung and my allergies have declared all out war. Much like my first cold of the season signals the arrival of winter, my first allergy attack lets me know we are headed into the warmer months. After two days of hoping it would go away I got smart and went to Walmart for drugs. Now I am armed with my Claritin liquigels to fend off all those nasty allergens. Rory has an appointment on Friday for his own allergy meds. Kiddo has the worst summer allergies. How many times have I used the word allergy in any form so far during this post? I swear I have typed it fifty times already. I hate the heat. Even just a little bit and i am sweating miserably. It has not gotten above 80 yet and I am complaining. What a pansy! I see many trips to Sonic for a Rt. 44 cherry coke in my future.

Basket cases

2009-03-20T12:31:00.001-05:00

So I have been working on this project. It is a challenge from our church regarding servicing your community. Kind of like in the movie Robots when they say "See a need, fill a need". My plan? To give returning troops and their spouses a chance to reconnect. J was deployed in 2008 for four months. I was lucky in that he only went to Florida. I got to talk to him whenever I wanted and even saw him twice. This is not your typical deployment. Even with all the perks I got with J's unusual deployment I still felt awkward when we were together for the first few days. When he came home it took us almost two weeks to get back into some sort of groove. The one who has to stay behind learns to do both roles. The one who leaves has to be a soldier first and anything else last. These are things a military family knows and accepts.

But what if when you got home there was dinner and a movie waiting for you? Don't have a babysitter? Don't worry! The Base actually provides each family with a specific amount of hours of free child care. Not a lot of people know that. The gift baskets we are putting together has all the information about base provided programs, two free passes to the theater, and five different coupons to a local restaurant. There are also candles and some great smelling lotion, Maybe for Wife to relax before husband returns? Maybe for more of a couples activity? It is yours, use it however you want! We are working with the budget to maybe include a disposable camera. We will see how that goes. Sunday I am meeting with the team to assemble baskets for delivery in April.

My girls are GREAT! Bradford got so much information (like the childcare allowance) and swag (calenders, magnets, etc.) from the Airmen and Family Readiness. Her Grandfather is very ill and in the hospital so pray for him! Parker took care of donations, a few candles, and located spa quality lotion at a price that wouldn't break us. Shel has been my sounding board on a few items, not to mention how great she is to open her house to us so we can meet together! He husband is away on business right now leaving her with three kiddos that she home schools! And she still has time to pick up some shrink wrap. A round of applause for Shel, ladies and gentlemen. Sloan has been busy (like appearing on TV! How awesome was that?!) but still found the time to give out any ideas or time that she could. In the end it was not what they did but how they did it.

Anytime I emailed or called, and believe me I bugged the crap out of them, all four of them were cheerful and eager to help. I know that they had kids calling "Mommy", houses to clean, errands to run, husbands to talk to, but they never showed it. That meant more to me than all the shrink wrap in the world!

Snuggle Bugs

2009-03-17T09:24:00.000-05:00

My kids love to snuggle when they sleep. This is not a trait they got from me. When I sleep I want to be untouched by human hands. The pets refuse to leave me alone. This sometimes causes them to get kicked, pushed, and tossed across the room in my sleep. I am a mover. I am not still for longer than 60 seconds all night. Sleeping next to me is like laying in bed with a bucking bronco. You might find yourself tempted to feel sorry for my DH J. Don't waste your sympathy. The man falls asleep in nano seconds, could snooze through a bomb, and has a tendency to sleep walk. Always got to be alert for that sleep walking business.

Rory and Lorelei both sleep smack up against their Daddy anytime they are in our bed. This suits me perfectly. I do not have to share any of my space. I am not heartless. If they feel the need to cuddle with Mom I open my arms to them. I am just not too upset to see them roll over back to Daddy.

She Ra was my Hero

2009-03-03T17:45:00.000-06:00

Did you ever watch She Ra? I was a She Ra fanatic. I remember trying to convince my mother once that I was not really her child but She Ra implanted into their home to keep me safe. Imagination is a dangerous thing. I loved Gem and the Holograms, Rainbow Brite, and Lady Lovely Locks to a level of being in danger of becoming a mini stalker. However my total allegiance was always to the Princess of Power. Those other girls were cool but come one, She Ra kicked butt!

When I first started watching She Ra I did not understand the whole She Ra/ He Man sibling thing so I wanted them to be a couple. Incest was really not a part of my vocabulary. I think I mentioned it to my Mom and she explained the futility of my wish. So I moved on to wanting She Ra and Bow to get together. I don't think it ever happened. He was always so torn between her alter ego and She Ra. The crazy owl and scatterbrained witch can know the secret but the devoted hot guy is out of the loop?

I never really understood that. I do not remember if they ever actually got it straightened out. Either I grew out of it before then or it was cancelled. Come to think of it Didn't Gem have the same problem with her main squeeze Rio? Are Cartoons programming little girls at an early age to expect massive amounts of drama for a relationship to be healthy? Hmm, food for thought. At least we didn't have Chris and Rhianna situations to steer us into adulthood. Is Bow had hit She Ra she would have given him an enema with her sword.

The Princess Bride

2009-03-03T17:36:00.001-06:00

What is my absolute favorite movie in the whole wide world? Well if you read the title of this blog then you already know it is The Princess Bride. I have no idea when I first saw it. For as long as I can remember it has been a part of my life. Besides my infatuation with the Governator, I was head over heels for Westley. I was totally in love with Cary Elwes' character. Every time he says "As you wish" I get goose bumps. What girl ever watched this movie and did not get weak kneed every time he said it? I know them not. There are very few movies that have something for every one. Almost every actor is a star. Maybe not so much today, but then.

Trivia:
Mark Knopfler agreed to write the music for this movie on the condition that Rob Reiner put the hat that he wore in This Is Spinal Tap (1984) in the movie. The hat appears in The Grandson's bedroom.

Director Rob Reiner left the set during Billy Crystal's scenes because he would laugh so hard that he would feel nauseated.

Despite his character Fezzik's almost-superhuman strength, André the Giant's back problems at the time prevented him from actually lifting anything heavy. Robin Wright Penn had to be attached to wires in the scene where Buttercup jumps from the castle window into Fezzik's arms because he couldn't support her himself.

While rehearsing for the film, André the Giant's thick accent prevented many of his lines from being understood. To remedy this, actor Mandy Patinkin slapped André in the face to get him to concentrate harder.

When Count Rugen hits Westley over the head, Cary Elwes told Christopher Guest to go ahead and hit him for real. Guest hit him hard enough to shut down production for a day while Elwes went to the hospital.

Director Rob Reiner was the voice of the R.O.U.S.s.

Writer William Goldman was on set during one of the flame burst scenes in the forest when Robin Wright Penn's dress caught fire. Although Goldman knew this was intentional, he was so caught up in the moment that he shouted, "Her dress is on fire!", thus ruining the take.

Mel Smith (The Albino) has confessed to never having watched his performance in this film due to the painful experience involved in filming the role. His character required him to wear coloured contact lenses and, unknown to Smith and the costume department at the time, he was actually allergic to the lens solution used. This meant that Smith was in constant pain and discomfort throughout filming; hence, he is reluctant to relive the memory.

Mandy Patinkin claims that the only injury he sustained during the entire filming of this movie was a bruised rib due to stifling his laughter in his scenes with Billy Crystal.

Quotes:
Westley: [as he is unsuccessfully fighting Fezzik] Look, are you just fiddling around with me or what?
Fezzik: I just want you to feel you're doing well. I hate for people to die embarrassed.

Inigo Montoya: [pushing his way through a crowd] Excuse me... Excuse me... Fezzik, please?
Fezzik: EVERYBODY MOVE!
Inigo Montoya: [everybody clears a path] Thank you.

Miracle Max: You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles

Vizzini: INCONCEIVABLE.

[Vizzini has just cut the rope The Dread Pirate Roberts is climbing up]
Vizzini: HE DIDN'T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE.
Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Inigo Montoya: Who are you?
Westley: No one of consequence.
Inigo Montoya: I must know...
Westley: Get used to disappointment.
Inigo Montoya: 'kay.

Buttercup: We'll never survive.
Westley: Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one ever has.

Westley: Give us the gate key.
Yellin: I have no gate key.
Inigo Montoya: Fezzik, tear his arms off.
Yellin: Oh, you mean *this* gate key.

[last lines]
The Grandson: Grandpa, maybe you could come over and read it again to me tomorrow.
Grandpa: As you wish.

Labyrinth

2009-03-03T17:33:00.002-06:00

Plot: 15-year-old Sarah accidentally wishes her baby half-brother, Toby, away to the Goblin King Jareth who will keep Toby if Sarah does not complete his Labyrinth in 13 hours.

Tagline: Where everything seems possible and nothing is what it seems.

Trivia: The full costume for Hoggle was lost for some time. It turns out that it was lost on an airplane and later bought from the airline by 'The Unclaimed Baggage Center', a store in Scottsboro Alabama. It is now on display in their museum

Cheryl McFadden, one of the choreographers, also goes by the name Gates McFadden. McFadden plays Dr. Beverly Crusher in the TV series "Star Trek: The Next Generation" (1987) and in the Star Trek movies: Star Trek: Generations (1994); Star Trek: First Contact (1996); Star Trek: Insurrection (1998); and Star Trek: Nemesis (2002).

The various things that Jareth does with the crystal balls (rolling them around his arms and in his hands and so forth) are not camera tricks or any other kind of special effect. They are actually done by choreographer Michael Moschen, who is an accomplished juggler.

David Bowie did the voice (gurgling) for the baby in the song "Magic Dance".

Director Trademark: [Jim Henson] During the Goblin Battle scene, while Sarah and the gang opens the door to the Goblin Castle, you can see milk bottles near the door.

The owl in the title sequence is computer generated - the first attempt at a photo-realistic CGI animal character in a feature film.

Labyrinth. The 1986 film by Jim Henson. One of my favorites and part of several fond memories from childhood. Sarah starts out a spoiled child. She believes that her parents should leaver her alone to play and do what she wishes. Any responsibilities she is given are met with her favorite phrase "not fair!" At such a tender age she really has no idea that the world is seldom fair.

Sarah: That's not fair!
Jareth: You say that so often, I wonder what your basis for comparison is?

The transition from little girl to young woman is difficult. Labyrinth is more or less Sarah's journey. She learns that life is indeed not fair. She was right about that. Dealing with things as they come instead of bemoaning them is part of growing up.

Hoggle: Them's my rightful property. It's not fair.
Sarah: No, it isn't. But that's the way it is.

In the beginning of the film Sarah's motivation for finding Toby is staying out of trouble. She is afraid of the consequences of her actions. She expects Jareth to just give him back and forget it ever happened. Wouldn't it be nice if we could fix every mistake like that? As the movie progresses Sarah grows to understand the weight of her words. No one is responsible for her dilemma but Sarah. Fear of punishment goes on the back burner. Rescuing Toby from a fate as a goblin is the goal. If she fails Toby will suffer for her selfishness.

The Junk Lady: What's the matter, my dear, don't you like your toys?
Sarah: [comes to her senses] It's all junk!
The Junk Lady: [picks up a music box] Well, what about this? This is not junk, eh?
[pause]
Sarah: [smashes music box] Yes, it is!
[Sarah's room crumbles without notice]
Sarah: I have to save Toby!

The exchange above between the Junk Lady and Sarah prove that she has decided to put away childish things and accept responsibility. Her things that were so very important to her now are just junk in the grand scheme. Jarth offers her several chances to disappear into his domain and live an alternate life free of Parents and Toby. Each time she remembers her task and carries on toward the castle.

The end is of course the battle of wills between Sarah and Jareth. Sarah has to confront the facts. All the drama she has endured was her own creation. Jareth did things as Sarah expected them to be done.

Sarah: Give me the child.
Jareth: Sarah, beware. I have been generous, up till now. I can be cruel.
Sarah: Generous? What have you done that's generous?
Jareth: *Everything*! Everything that you wanted I have done. You asked that the child be taken. I took him. You cowered before me, I was frightening. I have reordered time. I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for *you*! I am exhausted from living up to your expectations of me. Isn't that generous?

Jareth offers the ultimate temptation. Sarah's desire to be a princess. Whether that means to be spoiled and have nothing expected of her or that she wants to be adored by a prince is a matter of opinion. Jareth appears to have feelings for Sarah. He desires her company beside him as queen.

Jareth: Everything I've done, I've done for you. I move the stars for no one.

Jareth is a spoiled boy himself. Does her truly love Sarah or just the novelty of someone who does not do as he is told? If she complied to his wishes would she become a discarded toy that no longer held his interest?

Jareth: I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave.

Sarah blows Jareth away destroying his power and turning him into an owl when she tells him that he has no power over her. Jareth is King because he wields the ultimate power over everything. Sarah proclaiming otherwise cracks his hold on the people of the Labyrinth. Sarah and Toby go home. Toby looks over her baby brother and finally sees him with love instead of resentment. Her labyrinth friends crossover with her proving that they remain forever a piece of her life. Jareth the Owl watches from outside the window, now an outcast.

As I am a romantic at heart I have to be truthful for a minute. I always wanted Sarah and Jareth to get together. I wanted Sarah to make Jareth a good King and rule by his side. Maybe after Sarah finished growing up she would find the Owl. Jareth would have become humbled by his time imprisoned in his avian form. Sarah would break the spell and the two would live happily ever after. Yeah I know, wrong movie.

Nausicaa

2009-03-03T17:28:00.001-06:00

My Dad went to the video store when I was in kindergarten and rented me a movie called Warriors of the Wind. (Today I would recommend renting the revamped and much better version Nausicaa. ) The director is the brilliant Hayao Miyazaki

The movie tells the story of Princess Nausicaa from the Valley of the Wind. The planet is dying as deadly flora and insects from the Toxic Jungle slowly engulfs the land. Giant beetle type creatures called Ohmu that remind me of roley polys are the guardians of said jungle. Any time you try to destroy it, they come and wipe out your town. Three separate nations are represented with Nausicaa's being stuck in the middle. She works to keep her people safe from the obvious bad outcome that is fated to hit.

Personal agenda's and revenge against the creatures from the jungle cloud the judgment of the ruling factions amongst the two problem nations.Along the way she makes allies and enemies. New discoveries challenge all that the people of this world have trusted as fact. Will Nausicaa have to make the ultimate sacrifice to save the lives of everyone? My favorite little creature is the little furry guy to the right. His name is Teto. Isn't he cute?

Trivia:
The name Mehve (Nausicaä's glider) is derived from "Möwe", the German word for "seagull".

The lack of color fidelity used in certain versions give many people the impression that Nausicaa flies around in a miniskirt with a bare butt. This is not the case, she's wearing pants that happen to be roughly the same color as her skin, and the "skirt" is actually the lower part of her coat.

After the original, heavily re-written and edited 1980s release of this film in the United States (as "Warriors of the Wind"), which substantially changed the movie, Hayao Miyazaki demanded that any new licensor for his films be contractually bound to do no edits whatsoever aside from a straight translation and dub. Disney (who bought the rights to all of Miyazaki's films except Rupan sansei: Kariosutoro no shiro (1979)) has honored this stipulation.

Ohmu means "king of the insects" in Japanese.

Nausicaä is the name of a character in Homer's Odyssey

The "Nausicaans" from Star Trek: The Next Generation were so named because the Star Trek writers were big fans of Japanese manga and anime, and Nausicaa in particular.

'Hayao Miyzaki' was so upset by the original international cut version that he sent a samurai sword to the Executive at Disney with a simple note which read: "No cuts."

Myths

2009-03-03T17:25:00.000-06:00

Myths are similar to fairy tales. Stories that teach us a valuable lesson. Parables based on past religious beliefs. I learned a love for Greek and roman myths in the fifth grade. I nurtured it through out my school days until I arrived at college. My world literature course was heavy on the Greek. The insanely thick textbook is the only one I kept after completing the course. I got an A+, *brag, brag* There are many myths and stories that I am fond of. Below are some of them.
Clio. The muse of history. We named our mean old yellow cat after her. The cat is a descendant of another favored family pet that was tragically hit by a car. Clio was named as a sort of memorial to her father. She is the keeper of his history. My favorite of the nine muses.

Medea the Witch. She gave up everything she ever knew to be with the man she loved. Jason and his Argonauts landed on the shores of her father's kingdom. Princess Medea killed her father the king his heir, her brother. She did everything she could to help Jason succeed. When he left she went with him, eventually bearing him two sons. Years later Jason decides to marry another Princess for political gain. He sets aside Medea, but offers her a place as his mistress. Medea is enraged. She lashes out at Jason, who then banishes her. She is told to leave without her children and never return. Medea hatches a plan in the end gets her revenge. Jason is left with nothing in this world, as the gods favor Medea for her loyalty to them.

Eris or Discodria. The goddess of discord and chaos. Famous for rolling the golden apple marked "for the fairest" into a circle of rather narcissistic goddesses. The mischief maker. Clio the cat's adopted daughter is named for this lady. Our house was finally peaceful amongst the feline nation when the grey kitten Eris came into our lives. Our own little bringer of chaos.

My favorite myth is Hades and Persephone. It is often told as though Hades forces his will on Persephone. I prefer to think of them as the Romeo and Juliet of the Greek pantheon. They get a much better ending. I think they were in love and made it work the best way they could. As I have said time and again I am a hopeless romantic.

Fairy Tales 2

2009-03-03T17:22:00.000-06:00

This one is my favorite fairy tale. That is why it gets a whole post dedicated to it.

If you know your Disney Classics then you recognize the villain on the left. Maleficent. The evil fairy(?) from Sleeping Beauty. Is it just me or does any one else think she was created as a cross between the Evil Stepmother from Snow White and The Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz? She even has her own version of flying monkeys. Well, except that they are not monkey and they can't fly. Still evil henchmen though!

I think we can all sympathize with Maleficent. She was a little miffed that she did not get invited to the party of the year. How could she miss that slight? Like she was going to believe every one in the kingdom had to wash their hair that night. How does she handle it? She curses the popular girl with death by sewing machine. Deep down Maleficent is sensitive because a laid back soul would have been a little less over dramatic.

That is the girl in question on the right. She is not usually blue. Just the picture.
Aurora or Brier Rose as she is sometimes called is whisked off to live with three not so dramatic fairies in the forest. The plan is to keep her there until she turns sixteen. That is the age the curse comes into play. I would have kept her hidden until seventeen so the curse would be null. How smart is it to keep her out of the public eye until she is in danger? Not the best plan ever hatched.

Poor girl is bored out of her mind so she has started talking to the local wildlife and singing like a lunatic at the top of her lungs. ANOTHER lost prince wanders upon ANOTHER hidden princess. Seriously, get GPS. They fall in love not knowing that they are already betrothed from the cradle. That causes a little friction.

Philip wants to marry Brier Rose but he is promised to Aurora. Brier Rose wants to marry Philip but she has to go home and marry unknown Prince. Gee how useful would a little honest communication have been to these two?

Pouty Princess allows herself to be duped into coma by manuel labor. Grimm's Tale has her sleeping for a very long time. I prefer the quick nap Disney does. Philip rides to the rescue but before he can smooch sleepy he has to battle the baddie. Maleficent goes overboard again turning herself into a dragon that belches green flames. Not very familiar with fairy tales I guess or she would know that part of Prince 101 is dragon slaying to save yon maiden. The inevitable takes place. Prince slays dragon, Princess awakens from true love's kiss, happy couple get happy ever after.

Fairy Tales 1

2009-03-03T17:10:00.001-06:00

I heard all the popular fairy tales as a child. I think most of us did. Maybe you were told the classic Grimm's version. let me tell you, they were grim. I have heard it said that fairy tales were really created to teach children social dangers.
The world is quite strange when you look at the lessons fairy tales were supposed to convey.

Take the story of Rapunzel. Pregnant Mom drives her husband nuts with cravings. Desperate, he scales a tall wall to steal some kind of vegetable called rapunzel. Wife loves it. Wants more. Owner of garden notices all her hard work has been for naught as someone has been making off with her goods. Gardener is really a witch and tells dear old dad he can have all the rapunzel he wants if he promises to give her whatever she asks for in return some day. Of course being a man he doesn't think and says "sure."

Baby girl is born and witch asks for the child. She takes the child and raises her high up in a tower never cutting her hair. so we now have theft and vanity among our sins. A Prince gets lost in the woods hunting and notices Rapunzel and her ladder of hair. He watches her interact with the witch and pretends to be her the next day. Naive Rapunzel goes along with whatever princey poo says and plays several rounds of booty call. Bing* can we have fornication please.

This is where I have heard two versions. Version one: Prince forgets to re lace Rapunzel's corset tipping off the witch that she has had another visitor. Version two: Rapunzel is getting thicker and rounded in the waist. Unable to re lace her corset witch notices that she is pregnant. Both find Rapunzel kicked out with her hair hacked off. The Prince returns, is tricked by the witch into believing he is crawling up to meet his beloved. He is thrown from the window and lands in a rose bush. The thorns blind him. He wanders the forest for several years before coming upon a woman and her twin sons. It is Rapunzel. Her tears of joy land in his eyes returning his sight.

You see the couple had already been punished for their sins. So they got to have a happily ever after. Not all of Grimm's end so well.

The original tale of the little mermaid finds the Prince falling in love with another woman. The mermaid is offered a chance to regain her life from the sea witch if she will kill the prince. so in love she refuses and is then sentenced to die for her love. I prefer the Disney version with Ariel and Prince Eric.

My daughter is named after a type of mermaid. The Lorelei or Lorely are sirens found in the Rhine River. The story is that Lorelei was in love with a sailor. He either died of betrayed her. Bitter, she decided to end it by throwing herself off of the cliffs overlooking the ocean. It is said that her spirit became a siren. she sings, luring sailors on ships to travel too close to the rocks. The boats are destroyed, the sailors die. Charming right?

Lorelei also means "alluring melody"

We prefer to go with that meaning.

Cinderella is my Mother's favorite. A life serving humbly is rewarded with the chance to become a queen.

Cinderella does everything with out complaining. A virtue praised in the bible. I believe he passage says, "Do everything with out complaining or arguing so that you may become blameless and pure." Many blessings on dear Cinderella for her virtuous behavior.

I kind of thought the lesson was don't let your parents remarry.

Alice in wonderland. Hmm. I always just thought that was going to have to be explained as a dream. If it was anything else then large amounts of mind altering drugs were involved.

That said, I love the Cheshire cat. My favorite part of the movie is when he asks Alice "Can you stand on your head?" What makes is so funny to me is that he has detached his head, sat it on the ground, and is standing on it with his feet. If you have seen the movie you know what I mean. If not, you might be asking if I have had large amounts of mind altering drugs.

I assure you. I only take the ones my doctor prescribes for me.

Beauty and the Beast. Do you have to ask the lesson here? Beauty is found in word and deed. Outward appearance is fleeting. Never rely on looks to last.

I remember seeing Beauty and the Beast when it came out in theaters. I did not get all the symbolism then. This is one of my favorite fairy tales. I love that the couple found themselves in love with the people each other were. Not the idea or how they appeared.

I have been a sucker for true love and a happy ending from the cradle I swear.

Sweets for the sweet

2009-02-28T14:58:00.001-06:00

J loves Champs. A champ is similar to a drumstick. It has a chocolate cone filled with chocolate ice cream. A chocolate shell covers the ice cream. Instead of chopped peanuts on the top it has crushed chocolate cookie. The tip of the cone is filled with solid chocolate. Yesterday mom and I bought him a box of champs. He decided to share with his daughter. In his defense he did not have a lot of choice. She zeroed in on it and that was the end of that. J would take a bite, then hand it over to Lorelei. Lorelei would try to stuff in into her mouth until J fought with her for his next turn.

At Rory's first birthday he did not know what to do with the cake. I just don't think we are going to have that problem with her. I am going to bring a tarp to put underneath her.

2 doctors and the electric alien

2009-02-24T10:49:00.000-06:00

Lorelei has her 5th ear infection since November. I can spot the onset of one from 50 paces. Sunday night consisted of :
*cough*
loses pacifier
*wah-wah*
more *wah-wah*
miserable whimper.
J took her to the Doc in the morning. They had to hold her down and clean out her ears. Lorelei produces excess gobs of wax we learned. So glad I missed that one. She did not get the wax build up from me. I can forget to use a q-tip for a week and still pull out pristine white cotton. J is not so lucky. He was the genetic donor for that curse. Horrible acne in their teens is my gift to them. We now have the pink bubblegum antibiotics. Much improved attitude 24 hours later.

Where was I during Lorelei's appointment? I had a Doc appointment of my own. With my new head shrink. I really like her. We froze during the meeting. The heater had blown out. She asked me if I wanted to reschedule. I had a thick coat on and after my morning with little miss I was not about to forgo a little venting. I am an advocate for mental health. If you have baggage, go let a professional unpack it. I won't go into my personal inventory. I, like everyone else, have my own sob story and I will save it for the person who is paid to listen to me whine. Besides I tend to go off tangents (surprise, surprise) and typing all that would make my hands cramp.

Last thought for the day...
Why do the lights flicker in every horror movie? 2 AM Lorelei woke up wanting a bottle. While she munched I flipped channels. I landed on Alien vs. Predator 2. It was about 20 minutes to the credits. The big climactic scenes take place in the hospital, which has all the lights flickering. This is what led me to the flicker question. The big bad should either shun light which would constitute lights off, or just not care so lights on. In the monster entourage is their someone assigned to flipping the main switch spastically? I know it is for atmosphere and suspense. I just think it is kind of pointless. The flickering is enough to make me have a seizure.

Me 2 : Bathroom 0

2009-02-21T10:04:00.000-06:00

Those are my hands cleaning the bathroom with a toothbrush. If you know anything about me by now it is that I never
a) get down on hands and knees to clean
b) use a toothbrush on anything but teeth
c) scrub

I broke all the rules last night. I just bought myself a new toothbrush the night before and had yet to discard of the old blue one. I remembered this fact when I went into the bathroom to clean. Our house was a bank repossession. It did not come to us clean. I did a lot to it initially to get it livable but little nooks and crannies suffered from my inattention. Those cabinets doors have a decorative lip all the way around them. Dust had collected and was a permanent fixture. In the past if it didn't come off with a paper towel and multi purpose cleaner, I wasn't gonna overexert myself to fix it.

Today my body is less than thrilled with me but the bathroom sparkles and I feel great. My Kitchen counters are still pretty. My sink shines. I have not gotten backed up on either dishes or laundry. This FLY thing is really working for me. It takes 28 days to build a habit though. I am far from where I want to be. I will get there though.

Now I just have to scrub the living room and the kitchen floor. *grumbles and moans*

Geek

2009-02-20T10:07:00.000-06:00

Geek 1.o comes standard with (clockwise from top right) :
Pocket Protector - duh, to protect your pocket from attack.
Role play Handbook - Any down time away from the computer is for D&D.
High Waters - So people can see that you wore your socks today.
Computer Publication - The only thing more thrilling than being ON the computer is reading Manuel written about them!
Digital Watch - The only thing cooler would be a binary watch.

Geek is no longer an insult as 2.0 demonstrates. (clockwise from top right)
Uber Mobile Device - So if you are ever unable to access a computer (gasp!) you can still run your life and surf the web.
Casual Work Attire - Super smart people don't have to conform to the office dress code.
Wireless Laptop - Information at your fingertips 24/7
Leather Wristband - Watch? The cell phone, Ipod, PDA, and Laptop all have clocks built in.
Night Vision Contact Lens - I don't get this one, but okay.

I have seen the photographic evidence that J was once a 1.o geek. By the time I met him he had already begun to evolve into the current version. I saw this little picture on MyConfinedSpace.Com. It reminded me of J and several other friends/coworkers he has had over the last ten years. It is sad but true. Pretty funny to watch too.

Shine your sink

2009-02-19T11:09:00.000-06:00

I am not a neat person. I procrastinate. I make excuses. Anything to get out of cleaning. I do what I absolutely have to so that my house does not become a landfill. Toxic but not a total dump. Well that is over. I have found the Fly Lady. It is a real simple system to get your house clean and organized. You see I live in chaos. I have said it so many times I have lost count. I just did not know that chaos stands for Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome.

C.H.A.O.S.

Now I am learning to F.L.Y. or Finally Love Yourself. It is slow going since I am working in baby steps. Don't want to burn out before I get going good. My first task was to shine my sink. I have to keep my sink shiny. Sounds easy right? Well that requires keeping up with all dishes all day. I suck at that. But since I have to keep my sink shiny the task seems simpler. The house is broken into zones. Chores are divided by days. It is less work than I usually tried to accomplish in a day but actually gets more done. I even have allotted time for morning bible study and prayer. One prayer is that I can stay true to the Fly Lady's system.

So I am off to shine my sink.

Scary Moments brought to you by Sesame street.

2009-02-17T16:27:00.000-06:00

When I was a youngster I loved to watch Sesame Street. These days I can do without it but I do enjoy my children watching it. It is one show I know I can trust. However, I remember being terrified of the tentacle aliens. All they said was "Yep Yep Yep" while this eerie music played. Creeped me out. My greatest childhood fears were the dark, gremlins, and the sesame street aliens.Rory was not so fond of Prairie Dawn. He would scream when she came on the screen. Even if he was doing something else and had no focus on the TV. He would hear the little piano ditty that is played for her intro, whip around and scream. She doesn't get to him anymore. I guess he grew out of the scary prairie phase. He is doing better than me. I still get a little shiver from the aliens.

Briget likes to...

2009-02-16T19:36:00.000-06:00

I saw this over at Sheri's World. It looked fun so I decided to give it a try.

Rules:
a. Go to Google.
b. Type your name and the words “likes to” all in quotation marks. (ex. "Sheri likes to")
c. Report back on the first ten things that come up for your name.

"Bridget likes to..."

1. Bridget like big men. I try not to discriminate against any size person. J is a whole foot taller than me so if you categorize "big" as "tall" then I guess that is a correct statement.

2. Bridget likes to watch Oprah. Nope. Not a fan if any daytime television.

3. Bridget likes boxes. depends on what is in them. I do not dislike boxes.

4. Bridget likes Mark. Yes I do. He is the closest thing to a brother I have ever had.

5. Bridget likes to play with computers. She is not any good at them but she does like to fiddle with them.

6. Bridget likes to collect rocks. I used to have one of those rock tumblers that polished the rocks. Hobby only lasted about a year.

7. Bridget likes shag. Who ever thought shag was a good look for a floor? Ick.

8. Bridget likes to say bye-bye. I like to wave hello too.

9. Bridget likes to play with her dolls. Alas, I no longer have any dolls of my own. I get to play with my daughter's though.

10. Bridget likes Miles Davis. Sadly I am only familiar with his name and not his music.

The Valentine Meme

2009-02-16T17:56:00.001-06:00

♥ How long have you been together?
10 years. Only married for 6 of those 10 years.

♥ How long did you know each other before you started dating?
three months

♥ Who asked who out?
J asked me out.

♥ How old are each of you?
I'm 25 and he is 29

♥ Whose siblings do/did you see the most?
Since I have no siblings we must see his more.

♥ Do you have any children together?
Rory (3) and Lorelei (10 months)

♥ What about pets?
we have four cats. Clio (his), Miss Kitty (mine), Pickles and Eris (ours). Inigo is our pug.

♥ Did you go to the same school?
Yes. He was a Senior when I was a freshman.

♥ Are you from the same home town?
Yep.

♥ Who is the smartest?
I am going to say him for the most part. I am really good with English but He seems to be able to do just about anything. Except English.

♥ Who is the most sensitive?
definitely me.

♥ Where do you eat out most as a couple?
We really like Outback and Lone star steakhouses.

♥ Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
New York City, NY

♥ Who has the worst temper?
That is a hard one. Different things make us mad.

♥ Who does the cooking?
Me. 100% me. J won't even make his own PB & J sandwiches

♥ Who is the neat freak?
neither. J is the neater one but not a neat freak.

♥ Who is the more stubborn?
Him. I can be reasoned with.

♥ Where was your first date?
We went to the movies and saw The Water boy.

♥ Who has the bigger family?
Him.

♥ Do you get flowers often?
No. I get them when I need them. Makes them more special

♥ How do you spend the holidays?
Used to be in TX but now we spend them here in our home.

♥ How long did it take to get serious?
about 11 months

♥ Who eats more?
Me. He skips meals at work.

♥ Who’s better with the computer?
All him. That is his forte

♥ Who drives when you are together?
Him. he does not do passenger well.

Pain in the rear.

2009-02-15T16:44:00.000-06:00

This is such a mom post.

When it comes to diaper rash, I swear by Desitin. The original super thick stuff. Not that pansy easy to spread junk. Rory had a few mild to medium diaper rashes. Nothing that didn't look 100 times better after a day of desitin painting. I noticed Lorelei had a diaper rash last Saturday. It wasn't clearing up like I wanted but wasn't bad enough for medical intervention. Thursday night J and I went out to dinner with a couple from church. When we got home I took Lorelei back to my bedroom to get her changed into her pajamas. She must have sensed I would be home soon. She had created a poopy masterpiece in her diaper. As I am cleaning her up I see that there are these blisters. One pass with the wipey and we have broken open, bleeding baby behind. It was awful. I quickly handed her off to her Grandma and Aunt T so I could drive to Walgreen's. The pharmacist on duty either hates his job or the late shift. He was helpful but I got the feeling it took a lot out of him. He suggested we get to the Doc in the morning.

Doctor rook one peek and prescribed antibiotic, hydrocortizone, and lots of diaper rash ointment. She is starting to heal. Poor kid had to have Tylenol for the pain in her rear. Lorelei hates how long it takes me to change her diaper right now. She gives me these bored looks. "Hurry up, Mom. I have places to be."

Bow-tique

2009-02-10T16:14:00.000-06:00

There is a huge racket on the Internet designed to siphon millions from others. It is little girl hair bows! One of the advantages to having a girl is the accessories. Gazillions of websites are dedicated to creating spectacular works of art with ribbon. I say works of art because they want you to pay for them like you would for the Mona Lisa. I say nay, nay. I know two ladies that make bows. Their bows are just as spectacular and way more affordable. They both seem to have their heads on straight. One of these ladies happens to be my best friend. I have struck a deal with her. I buy all the materials for the bows, she creates them for me. Today Mom and I went shopping. Hobby Lobby, Michael's, and Sally's Beauty Supply. Sally's was for the alligator clips. The craft stores were for ribbons (duh). I bought enough ribbon for Lorelei to have a whole new spring/summer collection. There will even be left overs for Sassy to make bows out of them for her daughter MK, if she wants to. I cannot wait to get them done. I will post pictures of them before they disappear into Lorelei's bow boutique.

Belated snow report

2009-02-06T10:19:00.000-06:00

This was the scene from my front door last week. Growing up in Texas I thought what we occasionally got was called snow. How wrong was I. It was more like sleet that stuck around for a few days. Now this is snow! J got to stay home two days due to the horrible road conditions. That is Aunt B's little Dodge Neon parked out front by the curb. Hope she did not have plans to go anywhere.

Yep. I made a snow angel. I think my neighbors were probably laughing at me. You can always tell who did not grow up in an area where snow was abundant. We are the people outside taking pictures and making snow angels while everyone else is shoveling their drives. I have not made a snow angel since kindergarten. Rory was not about to lay down in the cold. Lorelei is too young for one. So the task fell to me. This is what J was up to while I made snow angels and wrote names in the snow. J is obviously the more sensible of us two. Yes, he is shoveling snow with a regular spade shovel as opposed to a snow shovel. Another sign that we are not used to heavy snow is that we are obviously unprepared for it. He did finally go borrow a snow shovel from a neighbor. He would still be there two weeks later if he kept trying to use the spade.
I think Rory was trying to tell us that he was all the snowed out for one day. When I asked him if he was ready to go back inside he told me that "Rory is too cold."

Lorelei was pretty aloof about the whole thing. She did not like the glare from the sun off the snow. After about 15 minutes she was done with snow.
The only thing she seemed interested in was touching the snow. She would have played with that snow in her Aunt T's hand all day. Being her mother I was worried about cold little hands so she was parted with her new friend sooner than she would have liked.

Blessed

2009-02-01T21:59:00.000-06:00

Today I did something I have not done in six years. I attended church. My parents took me to church every time the doors were open until they divorced in 1996. I still attended church more often than not and was active in the youth group. By the end of high school I had a job as the permanent nursery worker. With that job I was again at the church every time the doors were open. Then in 2002 our church found a man to fill our need for a preacher. He was very soft spoken and a good listener. Someone you felt like you could confide in to help give you direction. Very admirable qualities in a preacher. This is why it was such a shock to me when he would preach Sundays about a God that wanted nothing more than to punish me.

My mother is legally deaf. She has meniere's disease . She can hear with the help of a cochlear implant and a very high tech hearing aid. The doctors have told us that it is very likely that she will loose all her hearing in the future. Along with hearing loss my mother some mobility and pain management problems. According to a sermon from our Preacher all of these afflictions were proof of Gods displeasure with her.

J and I had planned to get married in May of 2003. I was impatient and wanted to move in with him until the wedding. This is not how I was raised. It hurt my mother and father for me to disregard my upbringing. We decided to get married in November 2002 instead. It was already late October. I asked the associate pastor if he would marry us. I had known him from the time I was four and wanted someone who I knew cared about me to do the honor of binding us together before God. After talking to us both he agreed. He was so wonderful that J asked him to baptize him the following Sunday evening. When we asked the head pastor for permission to use the church on Monday night for a small wedding service he refused us. The associate Pastor went to bat for us and wanted to know why he could not marry us that night. The Pastor had no reason to give.

These and many more incidents are the reasons that caused J and I to be distrustful. We were weary of finding a church when we had been hurt so deeply. I had watched an entire congregation be ripped in two. Those who stood by the Pastor and those who stood against. People I had gone to church with all my life were lost to me because of this civil war between us all.

In the past month I have been listening to Him speak to me. It is time to come home to me. It was not in My name that those things were done. Let me heal you.

The sermon today was about blessings. God blessed me when He brought me to my friends. I did not know six years ago that they would bring me back to the place I needed to be. God blesses me when He showed us the house we live in now this is less than a mile from the church. He put all these things in front of me. All I had to do was open my eyes and see them. I was so happy to be in His house again. To take communion for the first time in six years made me feel like a weight was lifted off of me. To feel welcome by other Christians and meet Church Leaders that I felt I could trust was wonderful. I didn't want to leave when the service was over. I knew I was where I belonged.

sick

2009-01-18T22:29:00.000-06:00

I have started this post four times in the last twelve days. Illness swept over my house. If you remember there are eight people in my house. J brought it home to share with me. I of course accepted like a good wife. He got better in two days. I slipped into a cold coma. Or I would have, had my children not partaken in Daddy's gift as well. Rory, who is like is father in every other way, appears to have inherited his immune system as well. After two miserable days, presto! All better. He still has a lingering cough and runny nose but so does every one in the Midwest right now I think. Lorelei likes her Mother's spirit. I prefer the "I think I might be dying" approach. I have been to the doctor more in the past two weeks than I care to think on. It took me two attempts to get Lorelei treated by a competent doctor. Doctor no. 1 blew me off because I am an over protective mom. Darn tootin' and proud of it! In November and December she had two double ear infections. It makes sense that in January I would notice the signs when they began. But no, I have no degree so what do I know, right? God Bless Doctor number two. He was the one who diagnosed our November infection. Today we found out she has yet another ear infection. This time it is further along. Might not have been if Doc 1 had been any good.
The rest of the Fam joined it about seven days behind me. Delayed reaction due to the fact that none of them drink after or kiss on the original infectees. I no longer feel like death is imminent. That's progress. You can still find me by the trail of Kleenex boxes. How one person can produce so much gunk is amazing.

It is not just the two legged who are sick. Nope. Even one of the fuzzy felines had to go to the doctor. Pickles became a member of the family in 2003. The plan had been to find her a home but when the time came it broke my heart too much to watch her leave. She has always had serious issues with urinary tract infections. We have been to vet after vet. They diagnose, prescribe, the end. Few months later we start over again. This newest round we went to yet another new vet. She ran some tests that had never been run before. Lo and behold we got some answers. Pickles has staph intermedius in her bladder. Has probably had it for a long time. She needs special food to help keep her healthy. Gee wish I had known this years ago. Could have saved me time and money not to mention the pain my cat has been in!

Bursitis. I has it.

2009-01-06T17:17:00.000-06:00

After waking up two night in a row writing in pain I decided to go to the Doctor. Sunday and Monday in the early AM I would have sworn to you tiny gremlins with dull spoons were busy trying to pop my knee cap off. Pain was shooting down my calf into my ankle and foot. I had visions of torn ligaments and ACL's. My mind began to wander in the direction of surgery, IVs, rehab Oh My! I put my panic on the back burner and made my way into Scott's Clinic.

The Doc and I chatted and she said it was unlikely spoon wielding Gremlins were the culprits. She had be lay down on the table to begin her examination. Twist the leg this way, twist the leg that way. No pain, no problem. Just my luck I go to the doctor to find nothing wrong, right? Not this time. She swung my leg around and my chorus of "no,no,no" to her "Does this hurt?" became "WHOA NELLY!" Diagnosis: I have fluid under my knee cap aka Bursitis. Knowing why something hurts goes a long way towards making it feel not quite so bad.

Not so bad that I have to have it drained off, thank heavens. Just lots of extra strength Tylenol. I have to ice it several times a day to keep swelling from occurring. During the day when I am most active and at night when I sleep I must keep it wrapped with an ace bandage. That is to help the fluid reabsorb into the knee cap by holding it still. It could take up to a month for all the fluid to reabsorb. A nice bonus is that I will probably have this as a new life long buddy. I have the tools to cope with it so I try not to complain. I am grateful that I am not going to have any big needles jabbed into my knee and glad I live in the era of modern medicine. Imagine what life would be like otherwise. *shudder*

Just some pictures

2009-01-06T16:10:00.000-06:00

Brother and sister. Rory is playing with a light switch that he think controls traffic light. J had gone to Home Depot to get one for the house and Rory wanted one of his own. He got the one we were replacing. Of course what one sibling has the other must try and take. Lorelei is quite normal in that respect.

This is the her new way of amusing herself. She growls with it in her mouth like this. J thinks it is hilarious. She usually does it in the grocery store when she gets bored.
Only a child of mine could sleep with her feet straight up in the air! Lorelei has this comfort routine she does to put herself to sleep with a blanket. She rubs her eyes and pulls it up over her head. We do not let her have the blanket unsupervised for this reason.
J setting up Rory's Train and Plane set. It is too big to catch all in one picture.
Rory can spend hours with his transportation depot. We even hear him with it in the middle of the night.

The Mutant Chronicles

2009-01-04T17:41:00.000-06:00

In the 23rd century Mitch leads a team into the earth to destroy "necro mutants" and save mankind. With an impressive cast this movie is fairly entertaining. Thomas Jane, Ron Perlman, John Malkovich are the bigger names in the cast. Some lesser known by name but I am sure you will know the faces are Benno Furmann, Devon Akoi, and Anna Walton. The story line was surprising in that it was detailed. Some points were left to the watcher to decide. The main point being whether you believed this was an alien invasion sort of thing or a heaven/hell allegory. I voted for the Heaven/Hell myself. Room was left for a sequel. I would put it on my blockbuster queue. Not recommended for a trip to the movies where you have to shell out so much these days, but catch it on DVD.

Trivia

The Mutant Chronicles universe was first a Pen and Paper role-playing game published by Swedish game studio Target Games. There were also several boardgames, a set of tabletop wargaming rules (with associated lines of miniatures), as well as comic books.

Goofs

Factual errors: Military ranks worn don't correspond to the characters. Lt. Steiner, obviously German, is wearing US Army/Marine style Captains bars (only Lieutanant if he were in the US Navy/Coast Guard). Thomas Jane is incorrectly credited as "Major" Mitch Hunter in the credits. He's referred to as Sergeant throughout the film, although his insignia is not consistent. In the trenches he's wearing Sergeant First Class chevrons, but then in the bar where Brother Samuel meets him, he's only wearing ordinary Sergeant chevrons - a 2 level demotion.

Link to IMDB page for more info

We Wish You a Merry Christmas

2008-12-25T10:21:00.000-06:00

I love Max! My son sort of resembled Max this morning when he saw the Christmas Tree. He loved all his toys except for the two shirts Aunt T got him and the boat. He loves boats. We have no idea why he took one look at it and said "No." Once bath time rolls around and he sees that it floats in the tub I think he will change his mind. The Geo Air set is his favorite. We unwrapped the box and Rory said "OOH! OPEN!" He loves his GeoTrax trains and now that the company has integrated planes into the mix Rory is just in heaven. His last present was a Power Wheels Harley Davidson Motorcycle. Not that he can really use it since the weather is so nasty. We had it hidden under a blanket. The unveiling was very exciting not to mention just plain adorable to watch.

Lorelei was getting sleepy towards the end so she was not thrilled with her Cabbage Patch dolls. She is a bit young for them but really it is a doll. How old do you have to be to hold a doll? Right now she is passed out on my bed with her new glow worm. Little girls can only keep it together for so long. This big girl is waiting for nap time after lunch so she can pass out as well! The family nap is one of my favorite parts of the holidays.

Its Panto Phobia Charlie Brown!

2008-12-21T18:47:00.000-06:00

According to Lucy on the Peanuts Christmas Special panto phobia is the fear of everything. Who said cartoons are not educational? Our dog Linus is named after the Peanuts Character. Besides the animals he is the only Charlie Brown character I like. All the others annoy me. I was always hoping that Peppermint Patty would take Lucy out to the playground and kick her...well you know. Pig Pen sure did have a lot of friends for a kid that never bathed. Where was child services? We are going to watch A Christmas Story this evening as a family. J has never seen it before. How can you say you have lived if you have never felt Ralphie's pain? It boggles the mind. My favorite Christmas movie is Scrooged with Bill Murray. It is like I strive to be abnormal. I promise is just comes to me naturally.

Aunt B, Mom, and GG arrived on Thursday evening. It was raining. What happened when rain hits concrete in below freezing temperatures? It freezes! Aunt B stepped out of the car and kissed the pavement. Mom followed her lead with David the cat in her arms. I rescued the cat while managing to stay completely upright the entire time. Yay me! J tried to run out to help GG with her walker. Lord know that is all we need this Christmas, a new hip for GG. Barefoot J hit the ice, fell, and then slid down the driveway. No broken bones but he will most likely loose the nail on his big toe. All he wants for Christmas is a new toe nail. Oh that was bad. Even for me.

Repackaged Television Nonesense

2008-12-19T21:32:00.000-06:00

Television networks are continuously trying to introduce new ideas to the public. Every year we are bombarded with so many options that we employ DVR's in every room of the house just to have the chance to sample them all. Most of them will fail and need to be replaced by the next season continuing the cruel cycle. Why did they feel the need to bring back 90210? It was dead, buried, and decomposing in the ground. Who signed the exhumation order? A great series has a shelf life. By allowing this atrocity what will we be forced to endure in the future?
Saved by the Bell: The Suburbs. Melrose Place Retirement Community. M*A*S*H* Afghanistan.
If you are out of ideas, that is okay. Please don't punish us.

Christmas Pictures 2008

2008-12-18T13:07:00.000-06:00

Mother and Daughter.

J cracks up Rory while Lorelei wonders what is so funny.

Rory Age 3 yrs. Christmas 2008

My pretty babies.

Lorelei age 8 mos. Christmas 2008

Merry Christmas from our family to yours.

PO'ed at the PO

2008-12-18T09:39:00.000-06:00

Yesterday I finally got the last of the Christmas presents shipped off. I walked into the post office and took a number like I was told to. I pulled #26. The clerks were on #3. I settled in for a long wait. Several people got fed up and left. Do they think tomorrow is going to be a better day at the PO? Not likely. When #25 got up to the desk I was so ready to be next.

I had not been paying attention to the little old man with the cane. A cane I might add that never touched the floor. It just sort of hovered in midair. Maybe he uses it for a counter weight. Little old man believed that his advanced age provided an excuse to cut in front of the 30 people already in line. Four little old ladies that had waited for a turn might disagree.

He argued with the clerk that all he needed was some stamps so why should he have to wait. Well for one thing we all did. He didn't just want a few stamps, oh no. He wanted ten books! It was taking longer to argue with him than just sell him the stamps so the clerk asked if we minded. We grumbled but gave in.

This man who was in such a hurry proceeded to stand outside the PO in 20 degree weather to smoke two cigarettes. So really he was just selfish and impatient. I had my own personal mini Scrooge. It took all I had not to yell "Bah Humbug!"

Welcome to the neighborhood.

2008-12-15T17:23:00.000-06:00

The WWF (World Wildlife Federation or is it Fund?) are reporting more than 1000 species discovered over the last decade. Read the whole article here.

"...Mekong River, which flows through Cambodia, Laos, Myanmar, Thailand, Vietnam and the southern Chinese province of Yunnan."

You can add the locations above to places I do not plan to visit. They were never all that high on my list. Among the treasure trove of new discoveries was a hot pink millipede laced with cyanide. He is very fashionable in the spring and summer but come fall he is so not in style. The color is to warn predators that not only do I taste bad but I will make you go toes up!
Plenty of lizards, fish, and snakes including this pit viper. Very pretty color but doesn't look friendly. He looks like he does not appreciate his picture being taken. As a photographer how do you snap a pic of that comfortably without a thick sheet of glass to between you. Do any snakes look friendly? Can some one find me a pic of a happy snake?

What is an expedition without spiders the size of dinner plates! Call me old fashioned but I prefer to travel sans arachnid. Lucky for the WWF the spiders were game for a little social interaction. Obviously he is not a relative of the Itsy Bitsy Spider. If this big boy had sat down next to Little Miss Muffet she would have had a massive coronary instead of just running away. Few spiders in this world earn my respect. I am a specist. I will admit it. I discriminate against certain Phylum. This arthropod I would have to his due. If I find you in my house, you can keep it. Just forward my mail.

Everything they found was not creepy crawly. Some new bats, rats, and flowers that are very pretty. My favorites were the annamite striped rabbit and the Laotian rock rat.
The tiger stripes just scream "I'm fierce, rowr!"

He reminds me of a chinchilla. I can overlook the part about him being a rat.

Missing my Lottery Tickets.

2008-12-11T14:32:00.000-06:00

I am listening to XM 822 holly. Macy Gray is butchering the song This Christmas (Hang the mistletoe). Inigo keeps walking over to the TV and doing the famous pug head tilt. This is when a pug want to know "What is that?" You can see a demonstration here. I am very picky about my Christmas music. I prefer instrumental classics. I fond that too many singers want to put their own spin or signature on Christmas carols. That bugs me. Don't mess with the classics. Reminds me of Britney Spears doing a cover of the Rolling Stones. Sacrilege I tell you. I do like Kelly Clarkson singing My Grown Up Christmas List and Whitney Duncan - All I Want For Christmas Is You.
I like tradition. This Christmas my traditions are missing by half. We are not going to TX so we will only have my family instead of both families. On the one hand I am happy I will get to stay home for a Christmas. We have made the 620 mile drive for the last 5 years. It kills. With one kid it was torture. With two I feel like I need to pack a noose in the suitcase. I am sad that we will miss seeing all of J's family (dad's side).
The Christmas eve celebration is always a blast. We have great food to munch on and it is BYOB. Gotta love that! I get to sit and talk with relatives I rarely get a chance to catch up with. J has one cousin that I am especially close to. I hate that I will be missing out on her this year. There is this one wacky tradition they have that I think is truly unique to them. J's Aunt Taylor always buys gobs of lotto scratchers to divide among the family. There are almost 20 of us and we usually get 6 or 7 tickets a piece. No one ever wins much more than few bucks but it is hilarious. We never seem to have more than one or two coins amongst us so we all have to share them. The family that gambles together...

Thank You For Not Smoking The Drapes.

2008-12-10T21:58:00.000-06:00

My Mother and I have always had odd conversations. My earliest memory of this was one Saturday when I could not have been older than six. I was sitting in the back seat as we passed the First Baptist Church. If you live in a small southern town you know that the First Baptist Church has the largest building of all the local churches. Ours was no different. It was impressive with a large domed steeple. As Mom drove by I noticed a large flock of birds sitting on the dome. Innocently I asked her what the birds were doing at church on Saturday. My mothers response - "Because they are Jewish." So I learned that Jewish people go to their place of worship on Saturday.
I was not the only one that asked odd questions. In Junior High Mom told me she wanted to know if I thought the Angels in Heaven wore socks. "Of course not," I told her. "They would snag on the streets of gold." She shrugged and we both went back to whatever we were doing before.
As I progressed into my teen years my questions transformed. Now I wanted to know if could date a high school senior my freshman year. My Mother asked me if I had been smoking the drapes. Smoking the drapes is a term Mom and I use lovingly when what we really want to say is "You must be high on some illicit drug because I know you are not dumb enough to ask me that seriously."
Recently it was Mom's turn again. "If you were about to eat a gingerbread man and he began to talk to you, would you continue to eat him?" Where she comes up with these scenarios is beyond me. The woman is beyond brilliant. She has two college degrees and only lacked a mere three credit hours to acquire a third. I like to humor her so I gave her an answer. "Yes I would. It is obviously a hallucination from the brownies I ate before the gingerbread man so I am going to continue to cure my munchies."

Just to clarify that last statement I am not one to do drugs. Well other than the ones I have a prescription for. Those are pretty awesome. I am a wimp anyways. Give me some NyQuil and I am told I am very entertaining.

My Children show all the signs of being just like me in the imagination department. I figure the road ahead is paved with odd questions. At least my days won't be boring. I will leave you with a family story of Mom that has to be my favorite. It also goes to show where I got my imagination from. Grandma and some neighbors had picked a bunch of strawberries and now sat at the kitchen table preparing them for canning. Mom was probably 8 or 9 months old, sitting underneath the table. Grandma and the ladies begin to hear growling. A single strawberry had rolled of the table and plopped onto the floor next to Mom. She was on her hands and knees growling at the offending fruit.

Mind Vs, Matter

2008-12-09T14:16:00.000-06:00

Dieting sucks. Sitting on my rear praying for the weight to disappear is not working though. I will admit that I do not really diet in the traditional sense. I just try to keep an eye on what I eat and get the exercise I refuse to do without being forced. I have a whole plan yada yada yada but I am not going to bore you or me by reciting it here.

The dosage change for my meds seems to be working great. Having less of the one in my system has lifted the fog that I was unaware was floating around me. The addition of the new drugs has compensated for any backlash from the decreased dosage and balanced out some of the side effects I was having. I contemplated weather or not I was one of those people who could go off medication and rely on prayer and will power to see me through. There are people who argue with me that my issue is all a matter of mind over matter. I disagree. I know my limitations. Besides saying you have an arm after it has been amputated won't make it reappear. I think God gives us the tools we need and it is up to us to use them. I decided God would want me to be sane and not homicidal. We shall be sticking to the program.

Christmas Cards and presents are going out late this year. You might not get your gifts on Christmas day but hey at least I got you something. It is the thought that counts after all. I thought I had more money than I do. Now I know I have to wait until after payday before I will have more than moths in my wallet.

Day of the Dead (2008) (V)

2008-12-07T22:46:00.000-06:00

*** SPOILER ALERT! ***

Plot: Residents of a small Colorado town are infected with a flu like virus that transform them into Zombies. Survivors band together to fight their way out.

Let us just get it out of the way. This is NOT a sequel to Dawn of the Dead. Ving Rhames was cast to screw with your head. He does not reprise his role from the previous Dead film. There was some commentary in the script that poked fun at the first film. That is about all they had to do with one another. This movie was not nearly as good as Dawn of the Dead.

Let us brush up on some zombie commandments. The director must have never heard of this because he failed to follow these rules.

1. Thou shalt not the Zombies smart.

We are talking about dead with reanimated cells. Zombies have basic needs. You, the living, on a platter. Therefore basic abilities are all they have to have to meet these needs. Run, jump, grab, groan. Nothing fancy. Problems solving is not allowed. The zombies have sheer numbers and the uncanny ability to smell you from far away. Problem solving is all the survivors get. Well besides fire, sharp objects, and guns. One the zombies start figuring things out, survivors can just throw in the towel. This movie was conflicting on the subject.

2. Thou shalt not humanize the zombie.

Mom, dad, sister, brother, Reverend Joe. It doesn't matter. Once zombified, you no longer classify as a person. We cry and mourn for you but quickly remove your head from your shoulders. Retaining any semblance of who you were before is a zombie movie taboo.

3. Thou shalt turn the zombies into gymnasts.

Back to that basic needs equals basic abilities thing. They might be stronger or run faster than you, but hurtle over five foot objects is out of the cards. A zombie that can jump onto the ceiling and run across it upside down like a ninja hamster is a big no no!

The only thing I can say for this movie is that they did try and give some explanation as to why the outbreak happened. A crappy, unoriginal explanation. If you cannot think of something better than "military bio weapon whoopsie" skip it and leave me wondering.

It felt very rushed. "oh no we all have the flu! No wait, not the flu we're zombies! Oh look, we're saved!" When a movie is over i do not want to be left thinking "Well that was quick. What are they whining for?"

***Trivia***

The alternate ending on the DVD has Salazar's character disappearing off screen after opening fire in the Nike missile silo. He screams, fires again, then the horde of zombies appears. The film continues exactly as it did in the theatrical release, until, as they escape in the SUV, they pass a building in the exterior of the missile base. Salazar emerges, screaming that he wasn't bitten, and muttering that everyone expects the black guy to die. He gets into the SUV, and they drive off. At that point, the screaming zombie pops into frame.

more reviews - Check!

2008-12-07T22:42:00.001-06:00

So it seems that 99.9% of the people who find their way to me on the web is due to my horror movie reviews. Out of respect for my adoring (maybe?) public, I plan to review more flicks. I am always watching them so might as well blog my opinion. If you do not like the reviews just skip them and continue on to my normal blogging material.

The craizer I get the more it all makes sense...

2008-12-05T16:16:00.001-06:00

This morning I had to haul myself out of bed to go to the Doctor. Nothing wrong with me (other than the obvious). Just a routine visit to follow how my antidepressant are working. A few unsavory side effects have cropped up so we played musical meds. Different dosage on one and added another. Now I am unstable enough for two medications. Spiffy!
Please note that I am just kidding. For those just joining me, my brain does not process the correct amount of the chemical serotonin. I have to have a little artificial help to stimulate production. I promise I am no danger to myself or those around me. Most of the time.

Since speed causes you to blow all your serotonin creating a "high" I have often wondered if I would just be immune. If it would have a null effect on me. One theory I am not going to test.

Christmas Carols for the Psychiatrically Challenged

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Queens Disoriented Are
3. Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and ...
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Full Personality Disorder-- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell You Why
9. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ---Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ...
10. Agoraphobia --- I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House
11. Senile Dementia --- Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House in My Slippers and Robe
12. Oppositional Defiant Disorder --- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House
13. Social Anxiety Disorder --- Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas while I Sit Here and Hyperventilate.

Boo Hoo to You Too!

2008-12-04T14:26:00.001-06:00

Leftovers stink. Literally. I despise opening my fridge or a piece of Tupperware and smelling cooked food that has gone icy. One of my many quirks. That is the reason we rarely have leftovers hanging around unless they are immediately frozen for a later date. I don't have a lot of freezer space so only dishes like stew and chili get the freezer treatment. J is a starch lover. He loves bread, potatoes, pasta, etc. Last night I made one of his favorite meals. It is a cheater lasagna made with spaghetti sauce, macaroni and cheese, ground beef, and shredded cheese. Here is the Recipe.

Easy peasy, my favorite kind of meal. J's favorite meal I make is beef enchiladas but he does not get those often. They are more labor intensive than I like. With me that means I have to do more than preheat the oven.

Tonight is grocery shopping at the local Walmart. *cringe* As we get closer to Christmas I feel the need to hibernate away from the general public more and more. Shocking but I did venture out this year on Black Friday. I waited until after 2PM so all the really great sales were gone but so were the people. I am not going to fight with anybody over merchandise. I will jut buy it online if it that important. Aunt T works at a Walmart Competitor that will remain nameless. She had to be at work at 6AM on Black Friday. According to her people actually ran to the electronics section when the doors opened. Stunts like that are how people get hurt or even killed like the man in New York who was trampled. Aunt T was putting items back and had a shopping cart with her to hold said items. She was almost done with only two left when she left her basket to put one away. She came back to find both things sitting on the ground and her cart nowhere in sight. Basket thievery was high on black Friday.

Rory is in a foul mood today. We are out of kool aid so I gave him water. It is like he thinks I laced it with strychnine. Doesn't help that he no longer takes naps. He stays in his room for the required amount of time but you can hear him playing. Right now all I can hear is the boo hoo in my ear. I never realized fruit punch kool aid meant so much to him. The only thing keeping me in a decent mood right now is Lorelei. She thinks her brother's crying is an invitation to vocalize. She has been singing to me all afternoon.